As a mediocre middle-aged, cisgendered, white male floating above all this like a fluffy cloud oblivious to the fact that I am blocking out your sun and raining on your parade, I am going to enjoy my position that patriarchy and God has bestowed on me until the mob comes and tears me apart like Donald Sutherland at…

I am waiting for the long-read on how potted plants feel about being jacked-on.

Oh are they?

Knee Deep in the Hoopla for sure!

I picture it more as a human centipede.

It’s like two toddlers going at it. So cute!

Meggett not so much:

Well, duh after the first time, you know-it-all dick-hole.

Not all of us have a massive boner when we poop. Sometimes the room is cold.

Turn the plastic covered pizza over.

The worst is if you accidentally piss between the seat and bowl onto the back of your pants. 

Would “Dutch ovened” worked for you?

What would have been the proper wording, “Sexually assaulted the idea of women reporters” or “Raped her career choice?”

I liked Maddox because it was an over the top farce. The absurdity of it was what it made it fantastic. Furthermore, I didn’t feel bad sharing some of his stuff with my wife. Tucker Max on the other hand was just gross and was more inline with the Gaping Maw or Consumption Junction. Tried to be shocking. Where you…

Aaaaaand scene!

I meant I am here! Here in the grays.

Here here!

If you don’t have a job you ain’t no worker.

Why do these pro-unionists live in the past much like our president. Unions flourished with closed borders and world-wide domination via WWII. We no longer live in a closed system of individual countries. They only people who benefit from unions are the ones that get through the door first. Everyone else is screwed.

*Inserts Inglorious Bastards reference.