Miley's penis was sort of...stumpy and Fisher-Price-looking.

Your friend sounds like a wizard of cakistry.

My reaction was, "They're going to draft her to run for president now."

What a pretty, healthy-looking woman!

Confession: I did buy my dress before I met my husband. But it wasn't really a wedding dress (forest green velvet) and it only cost $60. I didn't even try it on, I just basically ran out of the store before the guy could realize that he was underpricing it. Met the man about 6 months later.

I hate "anyways." A lot.

Fair enough.

Whoa. International adoptions are extremely controversial and politicized in many countries. It's pretty hard to imagine a country where scooping up local orphans and flying them to the US wouldn't need to have some paperwork and procedure. And if you think adopting an animal from overseas is expensive....

In a war-torn, poor country that may not have a tradition of animal ownership, finding a local permanent home might be next to impossible.

Yeah, I didn't do too well with it, either. And personally, I don't feel like HBC are the be-all, end-all, I more remark on young women making no effort to contracept at all.

I like to say, "You do know that being pregnant is one of the leading causes of fatness in women, right?"

I don't know how much, but I hear raves about that Mirena thingy.

As an ER nurse, I get to quiz people I don't know about all kinds of creepy intimate shit. The two biggest reasons I hear from teenage and older ladies for not using birth control:

Speaking of love...have I told you lately that I love your screen name? We have geese named Abelard and Heloise and I lobbied hard to keep (rather than eat) one of their offspring and name him Astrolabe, but alas, Señor Correcto would have none of it. There is really no need for an extra male goose, but still....

This made me heart ALT even more than I already did. Bless him, bless him, bless him.

But she stopped crying, and I think that's all he cared about. As it would be for many of us.

Also, is there room for Mark Wahlberg in your car?

And I am a emergency room nurse, so my perspective is a little skewed to the people who have diabetic complications...and therefore come to the ER.

She's also overweight, which doesn't help matters at all. And if that's bodysnarking, please feel free to move my comment to that page, but that doesn't make her not-fat.

To characterize it as a stereotype seems inaccurate; MOST people diagnosed with type 2 dm are overweight and have other risk factors. Your grandmother was definitely the exception. And obviously, people who have type 1 can be any size at all, since that's a genetic condition that gets switched on (possibly by…