Trump: What’s San Francisco famous for again? Curry? I love Indian food! I love Indians! I deal with the Indians all the time.

I don’t know if it’s stupid per se, but I definitely don’t like it and can’t figure out why so many other people do. Like I understand that some people like fantasy, and I understand that some people like dark shows and violence, but what I can’t understand is why EVERYONE, even people who traditionally hate that…

Actually one of the most common reasons people commit suicide is because they think their loved ones will be better off without them. They don’t do it to be selfish; on the contrary, they do it because they think it’s the only thing they can do to help people they care about.

I know just how you feel. I have acquaintances with two broken legs, but when I say, “Hey, how about walking to the hospital and getting that fixed? It’s only half a mile,” they’re all, “I’m in constant agony and can’t move!” Selfish fuckers.

Dear God above, I’m telling you right now, I cannot live in a world where Sanchez wins a ring. I can’t.

Hindsight being 20/20, Trump seems inevitable to me now.

tl;dr

If there’s one thing about this Super Bowl to look forward to, it’s that Cam Newton and Von Miller will be on the same field.

I’ll have to skip this one. I don’t like sand. It’s coarse and rough and irritating and it gets everywhere.

Can you hear the people sing
Singing the songs of angry fans
Who are pissed to know the Cleveland Browns
Have failed them once again

I feel sorry for Bungie at times. For months and months people complained without end that they wanted sparrow races. Bungie adds sparrow races and the community does nothing but complain they want more.

That’s half the joke...it’s John Gruden sayi...it’s...never mind. The rest of the internet knows.

I’m impressed Rodgers was able to get that much distance on the throw, while simultaneously keeping that hula hoop in the air.

THAT HAIL MARY PLAY I CALL IT THE DENTIST BECAUSE IT KILLED SOME LIONS FROM EXTREME LONG RANGE.

Holy shit I found something I hate even more than either of their comments.

Who could have foreseen allowing any cretin to become a gunslinger might result in dumb altercations ending with gunfire? The folk pushing for guns everywhere are mere human beings, not magical prognosticators.

Houston.

Egging on the guy to shoot the other guy in the head.

There’s something like 5 guns per capita in Texas. So where were all the “good guys with guns”?!?!

You know, maybe it is just the audio aspect of it. I kind of agree. But I prefer a male voice, with more bass, with xenophobic opinions, who occasionally costs taxpayers millions of dollars in public funding for a failed video game, and doesn’t totally believe in evolution.