I brutally murdered several prostitutes in the United Kingdom at the end of the 19th century. Coppers were too stupid to even consider someone from a hundred years in the future. Totally worth it, spawned a ton of great stories.

It's not an interesting story — we may or may not have come up with a name, added it to Wikipedia, and watched it grow (with little to no effort). It may or may not have been offhandedly referenced on The Colbert Report and later stated as a fact in an official YouTube video (oh wait those last two are verifiable…

Way back at the beginning, I asked the temp agency to put me into a more challenging position than just answering phones and delivering mail.

I often claim an allergy to chocolate, and sometimes to milk as well. Simply because people are ass holes and can't accept "I don't like it" as an answer.

I hated the taste of chicken as a child, but continuous pushing from family and peers through the beloved/dreaded phrase "You won't know if you like it, if you haven't tried it" made me come up with the lie, that I was allergic to poultry.

Eventually I thought I'd try it out and see if I liked it. Unfortunately my own…

All of my children are equal in my eyes. They have performed admirably in my service and I could not raise one above the rest.

Back in the days before mobile phones - I know, I'm old - when I was in high school... my folks had a phone in their bedroom, and I had a phone in my room. Same line, of course.

I told my coworkers that my car was in the shop when in fact it had been repossessed. That seems so mild compared to what I'm sure others will come up with.

that article is scheduled for tomorrow morning. Right after the how to fill a car with styrofoam beads because they parked wrong.

I scam charities for the Mystery Box.

"Get a Free Car with this Simple Wiring Trick"

Fun fact: bar hoping with a bunch of friends wearing animal costumes will score you enough free drinks to make you puke. I speak from experience.

Verizon Tech Coach her- I still get a few calls about this. I'd say more or so once or twice a week now, though, as opposed to six months ago when I'd say about 2 or 3 out of 10 calls I was taking related to this issue.

"People don't have to like you, so long as you do great work."

Great article!

Never talk down to them and encourage them to ask you (or look up) what a word means when they don't know it.

I don't know how much is 'native talent' and how much is my wife and my 'great parenting' (LOL) but our girl has been reading at a college level (grade 12.9+, in their report parlance) since…

There was a Oculus Rift demo of this game at E3, and I refused to play it. Being a large man, heightening the risk of said heart attack isn't something I like to do.

now add oculus rift support, and be prepared to die of a heart attack.

haha yeah, I'm the same way. That window closes up fast

I was reading too fast, and I read the headline as "Why Yes, I Would Like a Kitty Cyberpunk Grand Theft Auto"

Oh man, I had completely forgotten about being able to drive and fire the guns of a ship.