All fixed! Did my best to match the level of quality.

I demand a page that reads WASATCH SLUT LIFE!

I'm wearing the same dress right now but Rihanna wears it better, I hate to admit.

Someone get this guy a snickers.

If you are a father, don't worry, your kids will be able to use your credit card to buy the latest game, but you will always get a message asking for permission.

Will she use the Twinkie Defense to fight the charges?

Honey bun? Nay, this is was a cinnamon roll. Shame on you.

Not all women.

If you don't do things in public that make you look stupid, why the fuck are you commenting on Jezebel? Because let me tell you... you look like a goddamn moron.

Can people please stop making Autism THE WORST THING THAT CAN HAPPEN IN THE WORLD OMG!!!

I drew a face on my mother's diaphragm - I found it in my parents' bathroom and thought it would be cute to draw a face on it.

Oh, shut UP.

These are the kinds of adults that Roald Dahl wrote about: humorless bridge trolls.

#notallcraigslistads

#notallchasid ;)

I live on a street which a large group of Hassidim pass on their way to services at the Chabad House on the campus a couple of miles away, and I look like my forebears who left the shtetl 30 feet ahead of the Cossacks. If I'm working outside on Friday evenings or Saturday afternoon, one guy chats me up and tries to…

"Do not order the Skip's Scramble".

Skip's Scramble?

It seems the better way to save the server would be to tell the child that her question was inappropriate...

I'm not trying to be insulting, I'm just not sure how familiar with this practice you are. If a restaurant isn't certified to be kosher by a given agency (there are many, which one you will hold by is an entirely different, sometimes crazy, issue) than the food there isn't acceptable to eat. It's not just enough to…