esme-squalor
Esme Squalor
esme-squalor

I would say to go shopping together!

In my experience, it gets vaguely easier once you realize how much better you feel after it's done. Hopefully you won't have to cut too many people out of your life over the years, but once you've done it once and felt the benefit, you will see value in the action. Also—and I'm not saying you've done this but I have

There are so many people in life that you simply will not like, or who will not like you. Like, I personally think I am AMAZING but I know for sure there are people at my office who straight up hate my face...sometimes it bothers me, sometimes it doesn't. Regardless of that, my mission in life is to never be the

Will you be incredibly embarrassed and want to die if your bag gets opened, for any reason at all, and someone sees it? If so, maybe don't. If not, then do it.

My parents went through this when I was like 19 (I am 31 now.) While I cannot imagine how my mom felt, I can say how it felt to see it all go down from the (grown) kid's perspective, and man what a war-ravaged household it was back then. I'm so sorry you went through that. I hope all is well for you now. <3

A guy I used to date once told me that he could tell when a woman was, or was not, actually having an orgasm because of the way "those muscles" move when she is truly having an orgasm. Welp...he was wrong, he definitely could not tell, and he wasn't really interested in figuring out how to actually, you know, give a

I have found that complimenting someone on their perfume/cologne/soap smell? or whatever, if you can manage it without sounding like a creep, is a really nice way to disarm them. I mean, not like, in the middle of tirade, obviously, you'll have to work out the timing. But I do find it to be effective. It also works

Fair enough :) I thought I sensed a theme! Have a wonderful night, friend.

What's happening, why are you Tumblr Incarnate tonight? I mean, it's cool but.... can you explain me a thing.

I mean, I hear you, but then can I be a DJ? I enunciate when I speak, and I'm so much fun! I would never want to play that Meghan Trainor song, though, so I guess that would probably get me in trouble.

On my way home from work this evening, when I was about fifteen minutes from home, I switched radio stations to hear the DJ on Kiss 103.5 (Chicago) say "We'll have Iggy Azalea..." blah blah, except she pronounced it "Azuhlya." Long story short, I spent the remainder of my drive pondering how a person becomes so lazy

This probably isn't your style, but I asked my now-husband out for a drink by giving him some X-rated Severus Snape fanfiction (written by me, obvs) and a post-it with my number on it. For the record, we had previous discussed a mutual love of the Harry Potter books, and I don't generally recommend fanfiction as a

I'm with Itscocopop. I used to work as a store manager for the World's Largest Video Game Retailer (TM) and as one of the few female managers in the area, I had to be more firm to get what I needed from my staff. At first I was "the bitch" but after a while, it turned out that I would bend over backwards for the

My husband and I have a small group of friends with hefty appetites. When we moved in together, our place became the de facto place to hang out because "I'm the cool girlfriend." Which, you know, is true, but I was not about to always provide giant meals for these chuckleheads—even my husband loves to cook and he

I am 30 and my acne is only on my jawline/chin area, and I find it is directly related to my cycle. I breakout when I ovulate, and I breakout when I get my period. The times when I have been on the pill, it goes away completely. In 17 years of having both periods and acne, though, I have found no other remedies

Woopwoop! I was at work tonight, but I got notifications on my phone about the game. How embarassingly easy that our home opener was against the Sabres...they really didn't stand a chance.