The prosecution will build its case on the word of one informant.

Ciara already tried a Future upgrade; it didn’t take.

Glitches in his programming. Future upgrades will make it even harder for him to fail the Turing test.

(sends Jason Maxiell into 12 major Chinese banks) (within hours, 90% of American debt is forgiven)

players with questionable pedigrees for a Champions League club.

Couldn’t have said it better myself. If that’s something Jeb Bush considers a win though that pasty bland fool rly needs to reexamine his life.

Michael Schiavo was treated horribly and got the worst raw deal when the fucking congress intervened to collude with Terry’s parents’ denial and he was straight up demonized in the right wing press. It was monstrous how this whole thing was treated like a political football. I had to stop watching. There was something…

Nobody in charge seems to understand the scale of this disaster crime if they’re complaining about $55 million.

I was thinking that they remind me of a teenager that smoked weed for the first time, thinks it makes him the coolest kid ever, and goes obnoxiously overboard with his new ‘hobby’.

It’s also charmingly anachronistic that the dimensions of literally every MLB park are different, but that seems to bother exactly no one.

“You’re telling me Ronaldo has hit people out of spite?”

These are the kind of plays that will really endear Ronaldo to the American audience in a couple of years.

“It’s not mime,” I said, quietly and unnoticed.

I thought that was headed to a mother-daughter threesome.

It really seems that the FSU administration has gone out of its way to handle this entire situation in the most inflammatory, classless, and shitty manner possible. As a Clemson fan, I didn’t know it was possible to dislike FSU more than I already did, yet...here we are.

$250,000 to Kinsman and $700,000 to her attorneys

Now just imagine a read-option offense with Tolbert and Jared Lorenzen...

I’ve had mixed results with tipping. Often, drivers turn it down and say that Uber doesn’t allow them to take tips. The frequency with which they turn down tips makes me suspect that Uber is “secret shopping” them and they get in trouble for taking a tip. Which, by the way, is bullshit. If I feel like my driver…

Yeahhhh...women comedians just be like ‘my boobs. LOL’. There’s no intelligence, individual voice, or craft to it. Go tit. Er...got it.

it's super effective!