I don't normally drink light beer at all, but Yuengling is my preferred swill of choice and when I saw the White House open bar was serving Yuengling Light, I took that, because how often does Barack Obama invite you over for beers and has your brand, even in its light version, in stock?

I don't want to live on a planet where people really think Budweiser is a better beer than Yuengling. But as a native western Pennsylvanian, Gordon's absolutely right about Rolling Rock. It, like Stoney's (sorry, Shirley Jones, who is related to the folks that used to brew Stoney's) tastes like it's skunked even when…

Another quote from the judge's decision: "It's a well-established legal principle that the marriage license is actually a property deed if you're the husband, which is why gay marriage can't be legal. You don't know which one owns the wife."

Fact 1: I covered a high school baseball game about eight years ago when Riverside (PA) High School pitcher Danny Brown, then a junior, threw 140 pitches against Beaver Falls (Joe Namath's alma mater) on a 38-degree day. Brown later needed surgery to repair a torn labrum.

All those guys who joined communist front organizations back in the 1930s still got blacklisted in the 1950s. If "I did it just to get laid" didn't work for them, it shouldn't work for Sterling.

That guy who does one rep on the bench press, then takes a two-minute break before another one-rep set responds: "How am I supposed to sexually harass the women working out here if they're wearing sport bras that mash their boobs? Ew."

I've met Madden a few times. He's actually a nice guy. It's just that I hear "Pittsburgh Penguins" and "lap dance" and his name immediately comes to mind.

I still think Evgeni Malkin would be a better political analyst than Michelle Malkin is.

If you think that's awkward, wait till you see Sidney Crosby's lap dance.

And from the "You'll get this if you live in Pittsburgh category," Mark Madden will tell Malkin what to do during a lap dance just like he tells Dan Bylsma how to coach hockey.

This is off-topic, but I'm amused that one of this nation's foremost women of letters misused an apostrophe in the Tweet about the Nazis (not Nazi's) planned march in Skokie, Ill.

There's a popular meme going around now recommending that, when people get a call from a blocked or unknown phone number, they should answer, say "It's done, but there's blood everywhere," then disconnect.

Well, if you're setting out to win an insult contest, you can do far worse than Winston Churchill (although the guy does deserve his credit; I'm pretty sure both examples are from the wartime PM). Twain makes a good resource here too - check out "The Literary Offenses of James Fenimore Cooper," which will not only…

Yeah, but it's unusual to be talking about a shitty organization at PNC Park when it's not the Pirates.

That should read "Pennsylvania's top non-daily NEWSPAPER sports columnist" Few things more embarrassing than making a typographical error while talking smack about what a great writer you are.

In my many years as a sportswriter and sports columnist (Pennsylvania's top non-daily sports columnist, 1997, bitches!), I used the "he's gotta cut his childhood friends loose, cause they're dragging him down - with former IBF light heavyweight boxing champ Paul Spadafora.

The great thing about this quote is that it works just as well with porn as it does with basketball.

Don't worry, Baba. I know you're right. "Brocos" showed up in the link on my Facebook feed, said the guy who misspelled the name of a doctor doing pioneering work in fetal surgery in the newspaper today.

I wouldn't say that the hockey fans using Rich Peverley are the worst. The guy using Wayne Shelford to shit on Rich Peverley is even worse. Oh, wait. That guy is me.

Selfie or autograph? I got neither one, but it's still pretty damn cool. Yes, that's a copy of my 2009 self-published book about Vietnam War Medal of Honor recipient Leslie Sabo Jr., autographed by President Barack Obama, Army Chief of Staff Gen. Ray Odierno and Army Secretary John McHugh. No, I didn't get a copy, the…

"By the way, Amy had no boobs in that dress. A beautiful dress, but she's flat chested."