I don’t know what Ziggy or Mary Worth are, but I’m astonished anything got worse than Family Circus. I hate that goddamn comic.

I’m going to die from a stress related heart condition when I’m 40, solely due to comment sections.

Also, avoid local news television broadcasts. They are objectively terrible.

Things like orange juice probably surprise people, because oranges are so healthy. I assume people don’t realize the juice strips the fruit of its fiber, and also concentrates the sugar into unhealthier portions.

The worst is this from his “Pence Agenda” from his 2000 campaign:

Good thing there aren’t two evils running for president.

I thought that said Tom Brady for a second and got really upset, even though that would have been incredibly weird.

That bat flip is amazing, but nothing can beat Carli.

Item Bear is the best bear.

The worst part is that @rhizgawaaww hasn’t responded.