I was riding a ferry in and there was only one bathroom. The power was out so it was pitch black in the cabin. I hovered and my pee didnt make a sound. The lights came back on: I was hovering over a pile of poop that looked like chocolate soft serve, it was piled so high that I was just kinda peeing on the pile and if…

No, this is wrong. I am the car in which all the sex was had. I know this to be true.

Unrelated: I’m gonna start hiding Ghostface in the background of pics just to troll ToddlerNom years from now.

How can you be a beauty blogger when your repertoire consists solely of silver eye shadow and poorly drawn eyeliner?

I agree with all of this! And I’m glad you mentioned Lainey and linked to her TED Talk. She really does take the time to look at gossip analytically, and to question what is going on behind the scenes. I think that most people have the idea that gossip = bad, without stopping to ponder why we engage in it, why we…

Wait wait I need more Kacey Musgraves please and less Taylor Swift bullshit

I know you’re not a troll but you’ve never heard the name Chaka Khan before? Really? She’s been around since the 70s. Tell Me Something Good? I Feel For You? Ain’t Nobody? Ok, how about Whitney Houston’s I’m every Woman? That was a remake of a Chaka song (hence the shout out at the 4:31 and 4:35 marks)?

🙌

Fade in to Patrick Duffy lying in bed.

You must have no idea about John Lewis’ role in the civil rights movement of the 1960s or how powerful sit-ins were for that movement. If you did, you would not be calling this childish.

Smoke some weed before you hang out with your friends.

There are some pretty revolting men around, that’s for sure.

“But her apology isn’t going to do anything for your life.”

One thing International apparently hadn’t shared with his supporters is how to edit. Good grief.

I worked with a woman whose sister ended up divorcing her husband because of solar power. (No shit, this was the jumping off point for them) Her mom and dad got solar panels on their house and their son-in-law announced that he was a “coal man for life” and stormed out. He then told his wife that no one would be going…

Hi Dan—

Another reason women are better at these essays: we fucking write one every time we send a work email, only to get a one-liner back or just an “ok.” So many manfeels to navigate!