Those Nova players are hungry like the wolf. Something something girls on film.

It’s like these kids today haven’t even READ the unwritten rules. And what’s with these handheld phones they’re all using? I blame it all on the cyber.

White can’t take away his boss’s title!

Does Mark Rylance have a Spielberg pee tape? He absolutely ruined Wolf Hall. Then somehow he won an Oscar for Bridge of Spies, a wretched movie in which he had, like, 10 lines, and didn’t appear to be aware he was on the set of a movie. Then there was The BFG. I only watched about 10 minutes of it, but that was enough…

<Darth Vader voice> No, I am your father.

I would guess his role model is Steven Seagal.

It’s 2018. All opinions are equally valid. I believe Des Moines is the capital of the US, and if you disagree you are trampling my First Amendment rights.

Can somebody step in for me here and explain the First Amendment? I’m getting tired of this.

Ozzie Smith made a career out of bouncing the ball to first off the turf at Busch Stadium, so if it’s good enough for the (cough) greatest shortstop of all time (cough) it should be good enough for Donaldson.

So, we’re not going to talk about the Toronto caps? It looks like a knockoff I’d find at a local market here in Cambodia. #MCGA

Facebook is so ubiquitous that it’s sometimes hard to imagine there will be a time when it no longer exists. This, too, shall pass. I love going back to this hi-LAR-ious column about the MySpace monopoly. am waiting for someone smarter to me to create the “next Facebook” so I can fritter away hours each day on a…

Frankensanders smash!

I know, right? I mean, what’s the worst that can happen if one company produces all the fake news and wingnut propaganda for every local news market in the country?

Sinclair is located in a nondescript office building not far from where I worked in Hunt Valley, Maryland. Most people in the area don’t realize that they drive by the nation’s pre-eminent factory of fake news and nutjob propaganda. This is evil shit, Orwellian and fascist at the same time.

You can be sure that he spent exactly zero minutes and zero seconds investigating this. Add Amazon to the list of “shit Trump doesn’t understand”.

Sorry, but I’m still hung up on the “colluding with the Russkies” thing. I personally wonder why his skeleton isn’t dangling at the bottom of a gallows rope. Instead, he is systematically rolling back 150 years of civil and human rights. He is, in the strictest sense of the word, evil.

I realize this a never-ending onion of idiocy, but somewhere in those layers is the notion that a guy who bragged about not paying taxes is taking potshots at a company which does.

I am furious that the Postal Service is delivering stuff. First the USPS starts bringing shit to your house, then the next thing you know we’ll here news of a transgender Muslim abortion doctor wanting to marry a fire hydrant. HOW DID IT COME TO THIS? Thanks Obama!!!!!!

And the fans there should be forced to wear blindfolds.

The headline says “survivors” but there’s only one survivor mentioned. I’m not going to watch the clip, so are there more survivors mentioned in the video, or is this just a bad headline?