This has been legit the most disgusting thing I’ve ever ready on this site. Considering the length of time I have been a reader, that says a lot.

Ew.

Why is the FBI involved in illegal multi-state operations? I have no idea...

“Although I got zero points for my attempt at the triple axel, in my mind I went for it”

At least you’ve still got curling, right?

You know, it’s just not the same without the NHL in the Olympics, but that was a pretty good hockey game.

+1...wait...+5, no +10. +30. Now it’s +325!

Beautifully executed nipple Salchow.

In that they’re both big Trump supporters?

Of course scandals like this are nothing new in curling. Last year at the Tournament of Hearts the Skip of the Manitoba team was busted for having a blood-alcohol level under .12. The sport still hasn’t recovered.

Happy Birthday Mr. United States.

Man, Carol Channing looks really good for 97!

You’re probably a troll, but fuck it and fuck you. I’m on the second floor of an inside hallway in a school surrounded by heavy wrought iron fence. You think I don’t fucking know we’re sitting ducks? But going outside and being visible is riskier than sitting in a dark classroom behind several doors. What we do is…

Well, silver lining is they didn’t go with their first choice of “and the American Shiffrin’s skis have just pulled off the biggest upset in Olympic history as the American’s skis have been skied on to a gold medal in another great showing for the US of A!!” So, be thankful for that.

“Do you believe in miracles?... Neither do we. Let’s cut away and join Harold as he walks the streets in pajamas and novelty glasses and interviews bewildered locals.”

If you don’t have kids, leave now. It’s only going to get worse.

Dude, is your hubby a teenager?? Because he’s acting super immature.

“I got you a new gift, a divorce!”

Now somebody’s getting beaned with a 40lb piece of granite