at least it's just the dog. I'm from New Hanpshire and three of my high school friends have sons named Brady.

She said "who wants to hear about Paris Hilton?" I started squealing and doing my excited dance, which is just my hands balled up into fists shaking real hard. I was in her immediate sightline so she said "that is one excited gay" and mimicked my movements.

You're like a modern-day Frodo, Erin. No one knows it's really you who has the One Ring. No one believes you can make it to Mount Doom and live to tell the tale. But here you are, Erin, at Mount Doom, and you're telling your story, and goddammit, you're going to push Madonna into the fires of Mount Doom and ride away…

YES! Thank you for this. I'm Mexican, as in Mexican from actual Mexico City, and I swear I have never seen anyone wearing their baby hairs like that. Ever. In a city of 22 million people and the epicentre of Mexican culture. This belongs to a very specific subculture of the Mexican diaspora in Southern California. To…

THAT CLOCK.

I did have love letters. Lots of them. At some point I imposed some organization- one manila envelope for each major relationship. Shortly after I married, at age 31, I decided that I wouldn't want my future child to find these letters after my future death, so I disposed of them. I plunked them right in the…

The working late/butts in the seat mentality is so stupid. If I can get my work done in six hours, why should I stay the extra two hours? I'm not getting paid extra when I stay late to finish something or work on weekends or at night. The quality of work should matter more than physical presence for all employees.…

I knew it. See, ladies! You don't have to be photoshopped to have a disproportionately sized waist! You can just wear a corset at all times and only eat soup. Sounds grand.

As a semi-old, I do not understand fleek, not do I want to. I will continue to use whatever words were popular on the '80s & '90s and leave it at that.

As long as she's breastfeeding, the poopie has VERY little odor... when the kid gets off the boob... LOOK OUT....

meconium poop has to be some sort of cosmic joke. That is by far the worst poop in existence and it only happens to day old babies

"Shade" is the new "Ironic" — everybody uses it but almost no one really knows what it means.

I know, and that's sad. For me. I love the actual instances of shade. I want a Shade Court post with all shade all day so I can laugh and be entertained.

But it is! I SAW IT!

#NotAllWhiteAndGolders

*watches 5 minutes of the Brits* ugh, same tedious shit-show as every year. Nothing ever happens.

i'm hoping costco has these because i've heard they're good?

I have a theory about people who become wildly successful/famous on the level that Steve has achieved: their relationship with their past, pre-fame and success, is an either or proposition. Either they embrace it. Or they shed it like a snake sheds its skin, leaving it in the middle of the road, to dry up and blow…