Glad someone mentioned these because I woulda had to do some Googlefu otherwise to bring them up. The best!

"They're just going to run around campus in power suits and get offended."

So many lols. This dude sounds like a winner.

"I think these issues are mostly BS and a waste of time."

"Yet clearly there is something wrong with many male brains."

Yep. Here you go. Listen to him prattle about how he doesn't understand how people have morals without belief in god:

No. Any Tom, Dick, or Harry can run.

Let there be much consumption of Haterade

He's pretty outdated, in my opinion. If he retired from entertainment, I don't think we'd be missing much. But I'm biased against him anyways because he completely disbelieves in secular morality. Dumb.

You can just watch the first Matrix movie to save time. Don't waste your life on the second and third ones.

They only hint that Abed might be on the autistic spectrum rather than actually copping to it, and I think it's because they don't want him to be a depiction of it. Like that would be saying "This is what autism looks like" when in reality it has many manifestations and those with autism deal with it in many different…

I can't believe this show is still on the air.

lolwut (...i'll still eat it)

For some people it's like a hobby or it's their job. I'm not proposing that tax accountants that like to get choked strike up a conversation with a grocery clerk on the subject, but there are people for whom completely hiding their sexuality is akin to lying about who they are.

Yeah. That's true.

I asked a guy at Firestone the other day if they're allowed to accept tips and he gave me the deer-in-headlights look and then said "No one's ever asked me that before." I mean, hey, if I can tip waiters for doing a good job, why not the guy who took the time to explain to me and show me exactly why my car was making…

"Imma let you finish...because it'll reduce your risk for prostate cancer."

That's what I was thinking. There has to be some kind of corollary we're missing.

Maybe it's because I rarely eat sugary stuff, so when I get donuts, it's like dessert for me.

I'm okay with the term "kinkster." Seems like it would be less threatening and sinister to the population at large than "fetishist."