The AV Club treats us like mushrooms - they grind us up and add us to hamburgers.

Do I have to sit here while you eat all that?

I've gathered you all here in the accusing parlour because one of you is a miniature ship wrecker!

I don't want to pay for substandard gaffing.

Are you calling us soft? Just for that I'm going to this movie four times this weekend. USA USA USA

the robots are also racist? it might be time to shut this series down.

stupid druids, ruining our economy

Like, the yacht transforms into a snowplow?

How about they adopt a younger, cuter version of a current Transformer.

we promised not to tell her.

You gave away the one simple trick too soon, you're supposed to make us click through a slide show first.

Maybe he learned something from all this, and the talks will be about respect and consent.

It sounds like Tom from Office Space's follow up to the Jump to Conclusions mat.

drowned in caramel in October

the b is silent

Ibiza, DJ picture, what do you need, a roadmap?

I'm just glad we are all considered employees of the AV Club.

I thought Teti's lifelong dream was to own the New England Patriots.

Question withdrawn.

What the hell are you talking about?