I don't understand people's obsession with the French's attitude towards sex. Like, I've actually had sex with a French guy and it was pretty mind-blowing. Honestly, it was a pretty formative moment for me, because it helped me learn to put myself out there sexually. I credit some of their attitudes for that, so…

Lobsters? Is that truly you?

Okay, I'm of the mind that we should be willing to move to more affordable areas to live as well, but that doesn't mean I think a black family in the Bronx working two jobs for minimum wage should have less a vote than a white suburban family outside Milwaukee just because they can't afford to move to a purple state.

Even by white people standards, that's not very much time.

Julian Assange has famously showed absolutely zero concern for practically safeguarding people who might be affected by his leaks (not trying to diss leakers here; both Snowden and Manning were pretty good about that). But are we really surprised that Greenwald isn't exactly the same?

See? A Mexican would have scrolled down. Because they're not lazy.

In fairness, they're pretty consistent in their hypocrisy and awkward racism.

ONE TWO THREE FOUR I DECLARE A THUMB WAR!

Ugh, that reminds me. I was canvassing the other day, and I had a Bernie Bro try to explain that dismantling Dodd-Frank would be a good thing because it only works for the banks.

Also, if it were a black teen, they might come out of the subsequent police encounter riddled with bullets. Apparently, 12 year old black kids playing with BB guns need to grow up and stop being thuggish, but 70 year old white men cocooned in ludicrous privilege just need more time to grow up.

Wait, we weren't done. Against Hillary. He'll bring charges against Hillary.

Also, he can pardon himself, even in advance of conviction. So practically he can't be charged with anything.

You work on something until you succeed at it, right? I mean, if I paint a picture, and then I'm done, then I won't work on it anymore. Clearly Trump could not have truly completed his collusion then. It's like asymptotic assholery.

WHY IS HE HOLDING A SPATULA?

I thought the DUP was essentially the opposite of the IRA. I mean, they're unionist, whereas the IRA was republican. It's sort of in the name, isn't it?

It seems odd to compare either Clinton with May or Sanders with Corbyn. The first comparison seems especially bizarre; I get that people don't like Clinton, but she's at least moderate left-wing, compared to May who is at best moderate right-wing. I mean, I know that it's become this meme that European right-wing is…

I can hang in there when it comes to the system and even the mechanics of it, but where I get lost is the 'unwritten constitution'. As I understand, things work the way they do because Jesus told the Queen she was special, but she's not actually special and if she actually tried to act all Queeny they'd chop of her…

But you see, these swing states are where the real Americans live, and they're so much better and more pure than those regular (read brown) city Americans. Excuse me while I write a couple sanctimonious think pieces about how everything would be better if we just went back to a time when everything was like a Bruce…

Also, presumably, oil. Aberdeen is like the Calgary of Europe, right?

You bastards sent him over to give our shudders Predisent ideas! Well, Nigel Farage and Fox News.