How do you gerrymander a Senate race?

Why is no one asking the important questions? Like who would win in a fight, Amelia Earhart or a Ninja?

Most people care about what their political representatives care about. Take Ted Cruz for example, he remains in office because both he and the people of Texas love killing.

I can only assume the Padrino is made out of soylent green.

The answer is Farfetch'd, and I don't know why you'd name it Stoutland.

"You want gabagool, why don't you get it from your Russian wh—-?"

Yeah, but that time share can't be refunded, and that's what they really care about.

That Oscar was for Best Picture though.

Disney obviously perfected the technology decades ago, but they've never made a brown one before. This could be a big breakthrough.

Don Jr. is such a perennial lackey he just naturally takes second place, no matter who he's competing against he'll always be the guy behind and to the left of the most punchable.

Paul Manafort already openly worked for the same people, hard to see why he'd hesitate to take a meeting, and Jared probably wanted to sell them a time share.

Once you've crossed swords with a man you can't just throw him under the bus.

I have fuckloads of nostalgia for a time when Jay Leno having material for blowjob jokes was our biggest problem and that was 17 1/2 years ago.

They only people I'll believe actually see it coming are the ones who get rich betting against it, and we should send them all to jail.

The Vietnamese orphans whose parents sued him for wrongful death?

I know what you mean, how can something be empty and bottomless at the same time?

Or God really is an everything bagel, and gluten just runs in the family.

No, bodies process gluten (or fail to do so, which is the problem).

A lot of other GMO crops are just potatoes modified to grow outside of Bolivia or fruits modified to grow real big at the expense of nutrients.

We have to have a security!