+1 I would hate this comment if I didn’t love it so much

This seems like the type of article Deadspin usually pokes fun at. Especially since the Cubs went 5-3 in those games.

+1

Getting paid over $100,000 a year to make Ryan Tannehill cry? I’m sure they are enjoying that practice squad paycheck thoroughly.

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Brooks Wheelan is the poster boy for regretful tattoos

You know he would have “use” Comic Sans if given the opportunity

“*crying* It’s not even food! It doesn’t taste good, it’s just plastic!” - Me eating Panera

When you trying to be cute & playful with bae and she’s like “Stop that fucking hurts!”

Nutted but they still suckin

That first one where they drew the play up to not go to Bell or Brown was so dumb. On at least one of the final two, I would do a playaction pass to Bell or Brown or a screen to either of them.

Right? Like, this isn’t a game. It’s your job. Grow up. This isn’t for children. It’s for sad, mad old men.

I fucking hate it when people try and have fun while playing baseball

If that’s not an omen I don’t know what is

“Heeeyy welcome to the game! So glad you could make it, this is going to be so much fun!! Also while I got you here, I want to talk to you about an exciting investment opportunity..”

We need to also raise awareness about not going into the bathroom after Lance has dropped a “Killer B”

When I was a kid I got dared to drink out of the toilet bowl. My only requirement was that we give it a safety flush beforehand.

If it can’t get anyone to go see your shitty band or be your roommate, I doubt it will get your coach fired.

Even he said there was nothing wrong with the slide. That slide happens every day in baseball. Sucks that he happened to get hurt on it.

Cardinal fans have 0 self awareness. “HOW DARE YOU TALK ABOUT OUR TEAM THAT WAY EVEN IF IT’S TRUE ARRRRGGGHHHH!!!”