"I wish I was that good at avoiding injuries" - Derrick Rose

If he gets traded watch for certain players to start leaking what was going on.

I wonder if any of these are lies. I severely injured my ankle and foot playing hide and go see with my dog last year. If I was a baseball player I would definitely choose to say I was injured from "stepping out of my truck."

Everyone's faces looked like the Kicks are a pickup basketball team and Shved is that goober no one wants on the team but insists on making hook shots the whole game.

I've heard it all, so it's all good. Plus Deadspin had a "Pearl Jam Week" just a couple years ago so that's enough to compensate for all the other hate.

Remember when Kings of Leon were good? Ya, me neither.

Blue, Gold whatever babe you look beautiful let's just go, we're already late.

Ha! touche

Could be out till deep into the playoffs. About the same length as Rose. And Kane hurts worse because Hawks have a MUCH better chance of winning it all than the Bulls do.

Appreciate this. Any chance we can get some Kane highlights too? It's a rough day.

BUT AT LEAST CUBS SEASON IS COMING UP!!

On par with the guy that has headphones on but is rapping along with the song

I wonder how many Kurt Busch fans just took their anger out on their wife.

This is my favorite response to a Deadspin comment. Funnier than my dumb comment at least.

They knew the health risks when they decided to crossbreed a human and dinosaur.

Explain to her how boiling water freezes faster than cold water and she'll shit herself.

Comedians who can't take dumb little jokes about themselves are the worst. I would hardly call this a "betrayal." Jesus.

TRAVEL!!

Woah. Usually authors aren't such dicks like this for no reason. I get that it kind of rambled on, but she was basically saying "Why didn't they just say 'this is whole wheat toast' " Which doesn't seem like it would warrant an asshole response.