The best I can hope for is that my cocaine tree sprouts soon.

...

“OK people, step one is get that statue of Jay Z out of here. He said a lot of nasty things about me.”

Im impressed, most people are totally unintelligible when trying to speak with a dick in their mouth.

Unless he can un-invent automation and Walmart those jobs aint coming back.

For dinner last night I had a sixer of Schlitz tall boys and some pizza bagels so im gonna be sitting for a while too.

I hear the Paris location is lovely.

Im fixin to get drunk as fuk.

Nah, I think its just extra crazy long.

This brings up a lot of strong emotions for me.

“Auto-whatty..??”

Her left arm seems way too long.

Speak for yourself, holmes.

No doubt celebrating after wiping out some campers.

Are there any titties?

Aint nothin’ scares black folks and gays like Irish crap.

Whats with all the chocolate yogurt?

Who cares.

That whole family should go fuck a wood chipper.

Im sorry:(