That’s California.

That’s the middle class for ya.

Is that a button on the right side or a twirly crown thing like the Apple Watch?

Eh, just NH and VT. CT, RI, and ME can join the fenced area when they learn how to behave.

I think we should fence in MA and secure our airports, lest we let anymore cray in.

And isn’t that just wonderful?! Humans working together to bring progress. See what can happen when we just put our mind to it?

Oof, been there -_- I suggest not climbing that tree and just admiring what those hands could potentially do from afar, especially if he’s not someone you think you’d be down to be awk with.

You shoulda just “let him come over” then promptly made him leave after, therein ending the dry spell and getting him the eff away from you fast. Win-win.

You should buy 3; one for you, two to sell at a slight markup that is still below retail to pay for the first.

WTF is that?!

When the wife went to eat her dessert, he ordered her to give it to him. And he ate it.

That’s not a statement one frequently gets to speak.

Ehhhh...my father has an inoperable brain tumor and tries to pull the same shit, but he was a dick before and he’s still a dick now. Pretty sure the same applies here.

I can’t tell if this is retro or futuristic.

You can touch the strippers in Montréal, just sayin’. LEAVE WHILE YOU STILL CAN.

“Lines inside means lines outside!”

We fuck a lot here in MA. Also, on that note, usually when there’s a gay-specific bug (like “gay MRSA”) Boston is right there with SanFran, LA, and NY in having it.

Grrl, werk! Everyone knows a party wasn’t good until a 21-year-old ends up dead in the pool.