Honey Smacks is one of those cereals that honestly makes you wonder, who is buying this shit? Like is there a passionate underground Honey Smacks fan base? But then again, I like to eat Cracklin’ Oat Bran, so maybe I shouldn’t be throwing stones here.

“My people”!?!? Holy fucking shit, if that doesn’t make your stomach turn. We are not YOUR PEOPLE! You are a public SERVANT! You work for us. JFC.

Heil.... Myself
Heil to me
I’m the kraut that’s out to change our history
Heil myself raise your hand
There’s no greater dictator in the land
Everything I do I do for you
If you’re looking for a war here’s World War 2
Heil myself raise your beer
Every hot-see tot-see Nazi stand and cheer
(Every hot-see tot-see Nazi stand and…

She probably thinks, “I’m just saying what everyone else is thinking.”

Kathy Griffin, could you please just shut the fuck up already? Seriously. Just stop.

I’ve lost track of all the times I’ve made a mad dash to the airport, and intercepted my not-quite-girl-friend right before she gets on an airplane, simply to tell her she shouldn’t take that high-powered architect job in in Chicago, and that she should - instead - stay here with me (in quirky Rustic Falls, Idaho) and…

“If you take a piece of chocolate, like a little bite, it’s like 350 calories,” said Trump

LOLZ my trainer cheerfully told me “you look like a little tomato!” and I’m like...stop tomato-shaming me bitch

And not like oscars-ready make up. Maybe she has some on but it’s normal people levels.

I live next to a very popular lake trail and I have seen so many mesh panels lately. What is UP with all the random mesh panels?!?!?

already got updated on theashley yesterday. I didn’t have to watch the TMZ video, but I did.

The blotchiness! I like going to classes (in theory now since I’ve been “meaning to go back” for the last 3 years), but inevitably someone will stare at my wide-eyed with concern and ask “ARE YOU OK?!” Yes, it’s just my face, thanks, I’m not stroking out. And this is at the warm up.

Same.

Thank you, Amy, for wearing normal fucking clothes to the gym. Remember when you used to just wear, like, pants or shorts and a sweaty t? Not an ensemble?

I wish I looked like that leaving the gym. Extra points for her being so fair and somehow not looking all blotchy like I do.

The raccoon was identified as a she after she was trapped.

My regards to the non-binary raccoon.

I CAN’T TAKE IT ANYMORE!

Clearly this one is about the Cola Wars.

The power of Tom Cruise’s touch is known