You got tickets!?

I’m sure she’s not “celebrating” a breakup. Few do.

T. Swift does not “break up.”

I really appreciate when an artist really gives you your money’s worth in their show.

“We agree that if a person is intent on harming an officer they could do it without an app” —- but this tool makes it easier to do so, so lets ban it.

Hilarious, This is basically the same argument against assault weapons.

Look, I don’t drink, but if a drunk driver has enough self-awareness to not only open Google Maps on their way home, and also somehow process that information and drive in a manner that doesn’t attract the cops, then the person driving is not drunk enough.

“There is evidence drunk drivers use the app...”

kamikaze mission straight into the side of schmuck mountain

Here’s the problem with forgiveness and why I loathe calls for it: victims are expected to forgive the perpetrators who, most of the time, have done nothing to merit absolution let alone ask for it. Plus there are some things, like murder, where “I’m sorry” isn’t going to cut it for some people, like myself!

If I’m remembering correctly, Chipotle’s vegetarian options come with free guacamole.

She shot first and asked questions later. Tell me, if a black man had busted into the wrong apartment and shot a white woman before even trying to figure out why the apartment DIDN’T have his OWN stuff in it, and then failed to render aid even though he was trained how to do so, would you be defending him to this…

Really glad they came to the right verdict for once.  May her body rot in jail until it matches the quality of her soul.

Can we all take a minute to acknowledge trailblazer Katy Perry for bisexualizing sexual harrassment? Another civil rights milestone!

Just don’t try to split a car.

If she were to cruise by a retirement community, however, she would probably wouldn’t make it out alive

I will always give credit to Merv Griffin and the Wheel producers to keeping her on all of this time. They easily could have rotated the puzzle turner with a different, younger model, a la barker’s beauties, but I’m glad they’re not following the ageist trend.

IRONY ALERT 🚨

Funny thing.. if the police start playing goons to Trump, I think there are a LOT of people out there who would have no qualms at all about putting some policemen down.

We here at Hoover Toyota apologize for McKenzie’s distaste in screaming racial slurs on camera. She was just confused is all. Hoover Toyota is not a racist organization. We rarely express support for the “Holocaust” and we sell cars to ni— ... uh, black folks... all the time. New Tundras are in stock now!

Both times I've visited Chicago, I ate at Xoco. While it's the "fast casual" version of his empire, the food is great. First time there, the man himself walked out of the kitchen. As an awkward fanboy, I approached him to chat for a moment - he was politely tolerant of me, as befitting his modest and likeable demeanor…