This one got the June 1996 issue of GamePro (with the Resident Evil and Lunar: Eternal Blue strategy guides, natch) taken away from me after a friend lingered too long on this advertisement on a field trip bus. I was PISSED.

I've always been mediocre at tanking in other games, which is why I avoided it when I started XIV. But having had to wait upwards of 20-30 minutes for groups, I'm a little tempted to give it a shot.

The only thing I'm worried about is not being able to effectively do it with the controller on the PS4.

I went ahead and placed an order, and was pleasantly surprised when some weird previous credit got applied, so I'm essentially getting free shipping on it when it -does- come, if it does.

Music as a weapon? Not if the NON has anything to say about it!

The two phrases that make my blood boil more than anything else, especially this time of year, are "real job" and "big kid job." Even though retail isn't the same by any stretch, it's still a stupid thing to say to anyone who works a job regardless of industry.

It's as if to say the things I do to earn money are in…

Thankfully enough there's not a Skyline Chili to be found anywhere near Evansville.

We joked in our Family Video days (because drinking at work was the only way to manage, of course) that Evan Williams was the "Awww, sheeeit!" to the refined, "Ah, yes," of our store's favorite, Woodford Reserve.

As we discussed at Best Buy last night (with the news guy there to cover the PS4 launch):

"Food poisoning. All you gotta do is say, 'Uh, I ate something bad. Do you want me to shit my pants at work? Didn't think so.'"

This, but change out the dice for PS4 games. My wife is buying me one as a birthday/wedding gift but I haven't picked up any games yet.

A buddy of mine created a joke account for Karl Malone back when Facebook just became available and open to everyone. It was a joke stemming from some highly offensive edits to NBA Live '98 rosters we made our freshman year of college. In our universe, Karl Malone was a powerful demi-god who kept John Stockton—always…

Ugh. You know what song references girls and boys and is actually good?

I knew someone would get here before me, but goddamn if I won't second-third-and-fourth this recommendation. Anyone who hasn't seen this movie needs to, if only to appreciate the FX work. It's the only movie that continually creeps me out for weeks after viewing. The original novella by Jon Campbell Jr. is pretty good…

I realize there's more legitimacy behind it because it's Valve, but when I see the words "different manufacturers" I get flashbacks of 3DO and CD-I. Real, real bad.

Chris Kluwe's Twitter commentary on this subject yesterday was great. He was livid at the prospect of Smith being on the field.

Before the save the dates were went, we'd asked her if her daughter would be our flower girl. We told her the date and everything. She was elated, or so we thought. My fiancee has a ton of cousins with daughters, but wanted to be inclusive.

Then a few weeks after she said yes, I noticed she mentioned something about a…

What about grooms? I'm ridiculously catty and have a penchant for horrible remarks, so can I be upset when my sister-like cousin decides to ditch my wedding in order to celebrate her third anniversary in Panama City?

Because this is a thing that happened. Our RSVPs have mad-lib style blanks so you can insert an…

I worked for Macy's for one day (I got a not necessarily better offer with Express, but at least I'd worked for them before and wouldn't have to wear black all day err' day), and already could tell they had some fucked up priorities and stupid policies, i.e. "You just need arbitration! No lawsuits!" and "If you want…

Is it just me or did all that seem like an extraordinarily long preamble?

We're getting married in about two months, and since both the future Mrs. Fresh and I weren't too excited about the prospect of dropping money on a photo booth (because while it's fun, uhh...not so much), we floated the idea of asking our guests who use Instagram to at least hash tag their photos with one common theme…

I not only wet shave my face but also my entire head on a twice-a-week basis. It's so much easier now than using clippers once every two weeks.

But P&G—to the best of my knowledge—doesn't make the "Head Blade" I use, which is little more than a hot wheels car with a finger spot and an attached razor blade.