doublylinkedlists
doublylinkedlists
doublylinkedlists

Nothing happened. I feel cheated.

Is it you? Because it certainly isn't me.

"When I was pregnant with Blue Ivy, I gained weight and lost my body, and I found that I had to lose weight to find my body again. I was out of my body and I had to lose it to get back in it. Sometimes you have to lose yourself to find yourself. Ooooooohhhh-aaaaaaaaah—ooooooooooh-baaaaaaaaaayyyyybaaaaaaaaay"

Translation

My friend with perfect pitch told me about how when she was younger, she used to go crazy whenever her mom turned on the vacuum, almost like a dog, because there were so many pitches and it was so intense that she just didn't know what to do.

You wouldn't. Please don't read this article. I beg you not to.

I think about small talk as "Giving a shit about someone for no reason, and then working on finding a reason."

I left a comment saying I'd be interested in hearing what the responses to male callers would be but it seems to have disappeared from the article. I don't know why. I think it's a pretty obvious direction of continuing this research.

Pfff my yoga teacher was like "My son, Tasker..." and I just thought "There's an app for that"

I would be very interested to hear what responses male callers would receive.

I can't do twitter because translating tweets is too exhausting for them to be funny.

IN-VI-TED

I totally agree with you. When the top comments are long irrelevant screeds apologizing for any possible implication that comedians should not be racist because they are precious genius laughter-cakes who save society from the joyless PC police I can only sigh and keep scrolling until I find a comment like yours so I

My yoga teacher, a lovely woman, has a son named Tasker. With all due respect, Tasker is obviously an app, not a person.

I saw Sharon Needles perform live and she sang her song called "Dead girls never say no" and I was totally in drag that night and fuck if that wasn't an incredibly misogynist spectacle.

"It continues to suck that she's not here."

OMG. For some reason this line made me tear up and I am NOT someone who tears up for anything less than the most dire of Grey's Anatomy episodes.

"You haven't given me any compliments yet. I've complimented you plenty of times"

"You have a great attention to detail and I love how you're not afraid to lay waste to the delicate social setting of a first date with your honesty and fair-minded attitude.

Julia Roberts looks like a gladiator waiter. A gladiwaiter.

THIS JUXTAPOSITION RIGHT HERE

This comment section is mostly full of people who learned everything they know about drag from RPDR. The author appears to not really know much about drag culture and drag identity. Drag queens by and large will not give a shit about your (and my) hoity toity discourse on the rights to reclamation of oppressive

Nah I think it's common knowledge that Jesus was white, and common sense that he wasn't.