almost no interesting anecdotes about him, and my only takeaway is that because there are none

Uncanny valllleeeeeeey.

HYPO-pigmentation. Sorry. That bugged me.

Mostly just a Libertarian. But then again, there’s a lot of overlap in that Venn Diagram.

So it’s clear— my Donald had nothing at all to do with buying the tickets, botching them, or clearing anything up. But it was still All About Him. Just like everything else that ever happened to anyone in the entire history of the world.

I don’t care if it seems like I’m harping: Narcissistic Personality Disorder x 1000000.

wait is this where we tell our terrible moving stories because mine actually packed desiccated dog poop this one time

AS A MOTHER OF A 3 YEAR OLD GIRL, ALLOW ME TO RANT

*orifice

The other owner would invariably say, “but my dog is friendly!!!” And get super offended when I would shout back “but mine is not! Please come get your dog!”

“She’s the greatest athlete we’ve ever seen in any sport.”

Actually, her waist isn’t that small, either? Meaning in comparison to her hips (which are small)?

I won a cake in an honest-to-goodness Cake Walk when I was 8 years old. Biggest. Thrill. Ever. Got home late, didn’t have any that night. By the next night, after dinner, it was gone. The entire cake. AND IT WAS BLACK FOREST (didn’t think I’d remember, did you, Dad?)

“A large portion of women (in the 70% percent range) groom above and/or around the vagina.”

I’m not bringing judgmental asshats out of the grays for this, but my cousin was not an alcoholic, and not a selfish bitch. She was a young woman who wanted to drink 1-3 beers on weekends and literally thought it was impossible. She was also getting no other breastfeeding support and no one around her breastfed…

This is for breastfeeding people and people who plan to breastfeed, and it is very important: *you don’t have to pump and dump*.

ACTUALLY YES

My fundie family, who is inexplicably supporting Trump, donates 10% of their GROSS to a combo of church and genuine good causes (like feeding the hungry). Husband and I give about $6-7k per year. And we make less than six figures combined for our family of 3.

Depends on the style. I used to sell antique and vintage furniture and I still have a gorgeous Art Deco armoire on tiny little 6" legs that was death waiting to happen until I secured it.

This is where I’d like to take the opportunity to point out a bit of a parallel between this and de facto VBAC (vaginal birth after caesarean) bans. Although VBACs are extremely safe, they carry a slightly higher than zero chance of uterine rupture (even then, usually non-catastrophic). In the ‘90s-00s, with no new…