At a dry levy, in your Chevy?

I am *astonished* to learn that he is also functionally illiterate.

What you say might be interesting were it not for the existence of every other country in the developed world.

I don’t know Arturo’s mother but I reckon she’s using “literally knowingly. As in: “You probably think I’m misusing the word ‘literally’, but in fact I genuinely believe these people’s  cranial cavities contain nothing but actual excrement.”

I thought “FiveThirtyEight, a website that apparently still exists” was a particularly ironic barb coming from someone who works for the barely reanimated corpse of Gawker. Which I love, don’t get me wrong, but still. Glass houses much. 

But wouldn’t it be hilarious if he tried? Fuck me he’d find out real fast how little his supporters and enablers actually give a shit about him. I’d give it a day before the first claims come out from Breitbart that the Russians/deep state have got to him and he has to go.

Suing for $50m on behalf of “the good people of Miami”? Pretty sure that works out at 10 million bucks each.

I like the way his gun is painted in camouflage pattern while the rest of his outfit is quite, er, “flamboyant”. Can only assume he was lying in wait in a closet.

I’ve actually had a good idea for a Trump administration reality show that works really well I think. How it goes is, we gather them all up - the family, Kelly, McConnell, Ryan, Huckabee Sanders, Gorka, Miller and what have you - and put them on a luxurious cruise ship. They form teams of two or three and have to…

The thing is, they don’t have to be convincing. They don’t even have to believe it themselves. All they’re doing is creating a permission structure that allows their moronic voters to be happy when Congress refuses to impeach. Doesn’t matter if it’s remotely plausible or even logical. Just something the base can point…

The administration should just cut to the chase and take the following line: “The suggestion is that Porter would be subject to blackmail as he did not disclose that he is a wife beater. However, this administration has demonstrated on multiple occasions that it couldn’t give two shits about spousal abuse. Therefore…

Don’t sweat it. Think of it this way: if you see a beautiful sunset, you don’t beat yourself up because you’re worried other people might also be thinking “what a beautiful sunset”. You see something that makes you think Mitch McConnell is an amoral shitstain, again you’re not gonna be Robinson Crusoe...

You’re assuming he has any shame to begin with. I would have thought being utterly shameless was more or less a prerequisite for people in his line of work.

She might be wearing orange and red, but what she’s really seeing is green.

Didn’t stand for the anthem?

That fake news about rich men and the eye of a needle? Trump could pass through the eye of a needle. Except his cock, because it’s so massive.

It’s amazing how you people always stop replying to the difficult questions.

You people are so quick to judge. He said “the African race” because he was aware “people from Bongo Bongo Land” would sound racist. So he’s obviously trying. What’s your problem?

Yes, as I said: you countered an argument that nobody was making. Congratulations.