Coming soon — limp ponytail.

Fighting the urge to scroll back up to see what you're talking about. Goddammit I will win this fight.

Forget the ridiculous third reason for a moment. Why do there seem to be so many otherwise intelligent people who don’t seem to understand that the vast majority of the time it’s not appropriate to act on your sexual impulses? Literally everyday of the week I work with and walk by women that I am attracted to,…

I want to share a funny story from something I observed this weekend. It made me laugh out loud because I hated people like these customers when I worked in restaurants, and I wish that I handled them the way this server did.

aaaaaand it’s over!!! Brittney just filed for annulment lolz http://www.justjared.com/2015/06/05/bri…

As a native Kentuckian (who once even spent a year working with George Clooney’s sister), let me politely invite you to go fuck yourself.

I think a life altering tragedy always brings a loss of innocence that makes pure joy a thing of the past. It’s always mixed with a little bit of sorrow. That doesn’t mean life sucks forever afterward, but it will always be different.

Oh man, I cried for 3 days straight when I found out a guy who once claimed to be in love with me ran off and got engaged. I never said anything other then a meek congratulations, and I eventually found someone, but I still hope she gets fat. Like so fat she gets elephant trunk legs.

No. You aren’t dating them anymore, they aren’t family, and it’s none of their business. Why would you?

he would be elated, that sick little perv~ <3<3<3