MONSTER HESH WANTS SEX!

From Our Dumb Century:

SWEET FANCY MOSES!

Two, if you're a Beagle Boy.

{CUES UP JAUNTY 'OCEAN'S ELEVEN' MUSIC]

I'm still LOL'g over this race, "Beat the Freeze."

You have to come to Whole Foods with a lotta cashews in your pockets.

I posted this in the Alex Jones' thread, didn't think it'd get its own blurb…

That was a good one.

"What's a gill?"

There's a street corner in Phoenix (I think 20th & Camelback) that has both a Trader Joe's & Whole Foods in the same lot. I always imagine what kind of patrons engage in turf wars there.

Try eating them one pea at a time.

[SHOEHORNS CHILI REFERENCE HERE]

I read the "guys, guys, guys" in Owen Wilson's voice.

Um, are you asking for Sympathy?

Win, place, or show!

He'll forget about the audio after glomming that big bowl of chili conveniently placed in the Green Room.

Sterling Archer was right to fear crocs & alligators.

He shoulda been the Joker.

Jerry?