Hitting on your TA is bad, kids. If they agree to visit Bonetown with you and you get caught (and frankly, 18 year olds are not known for their discretion and a TA dumb enough to sleep with a student probably isn't making great choices either), it's not going to end well for either of you. If they don't, then you're…

I'm not even gonna lie. I'm totally imagining what it must be like to have macrobiotically fit and virile (it's hard as steel and never wants to go down, Lord!) Chris Martin wanting to bang the shit out of one because he's in a sadness spiral over his marriage ending and also trying very hard to fuck the Gwyneth out…

Speaking as a wheelchair user, the only thing that amazes me about this story is that it hasn't happened more often. My experience has been that most airports do an impressively awful job of treating passengers in wheelchairs like human beings. (There are exceptions, to be fair - I've generally had better experiences…

OF COURSE! Punching them in the nose! Why didn't every rape victim ever think of that? Rapists: they're just like sharks, the cheeky little fuckers.

I stand with you in adverbial love. I apologize to 'adverb' for using it adjectivally. Adjective, I just did you a favor by using you adverbially.

It's much cheaper to just take a picture of your own asshole and glue it to your face.

It also doesn't have ten speeds and a bell, but I can dream.

RACE ISN'T EVEN A THING. COLOR DOESN'T EXIST. IT'S ONLY ABOUT CLASS. FAIRIES. RAINBOWS. SUGARPLUMS.

Oh my god, I just had a conversation with an acquaintance of mine today about this.

I'm here in the comments to meet and greet all the people who want to tell me that this is "probably fake" or give me lengthy lessons on "how space travel doesn't work that way." I am here for you guys.

No. I love parenthetical asides. They make me who I am as a person.

You're just saying that so no one will suspect the bearnado you're planning.

Police report the rabbit survived the beating and is recovering.

Nicholas Sparks is the Thomas Kinkade of the literature world.

When I was a kid, coming home on my motorcycle in the wee hours I spotted a skunk with its head stuck in a tomato paste can - walking in a circle on the street and clunking the can every few steps. I rescued it, in spite of being sure it was going to end with me being all skunked up.

Our entire judicial system apparently finds beliefs to be more important than facts and human life.

I'm going to be opening a coffee shop soon, and all tips will go to the local Humane Society. I'll be paying an hourly wage that's significantly more than the minimum wage here and that's north of the figure you cited as well.

Agreed. After 30 years of diets and diet food and failing and failing, I started just trying to cook and eat real food with real ingredients as often as I could. My husband and I fail at this all the time, but we figure if we at least try to make FOOD whenever we have the wherewithall, we're helping ourselves out bit…

One last thought, on why I think I was so conflicted at the end of this experiment: