"Sorry. You're too old to watch the sixth post-credit sequence."
*Edward Norton comes out and beats lingering audience members with a broom*

Even Norman Osborne's corn rows are better than whatever the president's got going on domeside.

Every 27-28 years he comes out of the sewers to feed on our disdain.

Seriously. That number should be way higher for someone thinking it's worth turning your back on Jane Seymour.

But you have to admit they'd do anything for Randolph Scott.

They're doing a stateside remake of Toni Erdman that's sure to have the pratfalls and classic-rock music queues you seek in your comedy.

You, my friend, have not seen The Chumscrubber.

Mission to Mars sounds like the kind of first-date movie that makes you immediately call everything off even though the other person didn't want to see it all that much. Like "we coulda thrown rocks at one another in the parking lot and instead you let Mission to Mars happen to our night."

I thought it was pretty all right. But then I'm 30. I wonder what I'll know a year from now.

Shake it for me girl, I wanna be your backdoor Han.

I think that, based on the quote and the title of the movie, that there will be absolutely no more jedi in these movies. And they'll also stop traveling in spaceships and meeting aliens.

You forgot to mention the 7.6 from Pitchfork and the number-three spot on every single best-of list in December.

I'm not OP (I like Damn. a whole darn lot), but I found Blonde to be seven or eight good tracks surrounded by a lot of noodling and weird half-songs.

Is he related to Johnny Rock, protagonist of FFX hit Sex And Drugs And Rock And Roll?

Just call him Bodacious T!

I like Magic Tavern, but the new season has gone from "the plot's progressing finally!" to "this is just a new status quo get ready for more sitting around and talking."

I liked Logan, but it's my eternal duty to point out the scene where they have a two-minute conversation as the entirety of Shane plays out on the tv behind them during that same span.

I saw the New Pornographers on the main stage at Sasquatch in '08. Destroyer was on a small side stage before them, with like a 20-minute overlap, which boggled my mind. So I slipped out of Destroyer early and posted up at the main stage. The Pornographers played a bit, then AC Newman started calling to the backstage…

I'm bummed Herzog hasn't put out a great narrative film in ages. Depending on how you look at it, just about anything post-80s has been perfunctorily filmed and kinda listless. Bad Lieutenant is more famous for some flashes of Nic Cage wacky, I only remember Rescue Dawn as a rehash of Little Dieter that turned the…

I'm Commander Shepard and this Game in Progress Article is my favorite in the AVClub.