I picture this done in the voice of Robert Osborne.

That part I remember very clearly, because when Aragorn fake-died, I rolled my eyes and got up and walked out of the theater. I never saw the rest of the film. I hadn't read the books at that point but there was no doubt that he was coming back, and I had already been displeased with the rest of the film, so that…

That is an interesting interpretation of what happened.

Uh, is that "Nutcracker"? At least it's Russian, I guess.

It should be a binary scale if that's what they want. If it's out of five, I'm not handing out a perfect five unless the employee is Nadia Comaneci.

The best bad shark movie is "Shark in Venice" with Alec Baldwin's brother and Scarlett Johansson's sister. It is unparalleled.

Mythbusters: the show where they take five minutes of interesting stuff and pack it into half an hour.

The regional Bell phone provider out here used to be Qwest. Maybe still is. Their slogan used to be "Ride the Light". I always thought it was hilarious. Use one of their phones, and you'll get electrocuted and fade to black.

I think a few of the S&M versions are better. I wish they'd done Fade to Black on that one.

I liked "Astronomy". Not even sure who sang the original.