If I am trying to pick you up, I follow up with: But my vagina snapped back, can we do it?

I used to have an aversion to sperm because of the first time I had sex. When he came on my stomach it made me want to vomit. It took me years to get past it. Now I swallow like a champ, but I do it for someone I love, or at least like a lot. Because sperm isn't as delicious as twitter sluts would have you believe.

Yes we do, but to avoid kitty quarantine we smuggle the cats in using giant moose costumes.

Oh jeez, I wish the conversation was that rational. She visited an Air Force base chow hall to talk about nutrition and some of those assholes lost their minds. That damn Moochelle, eating crackers like she owns the place.

NO POTATO SALAD FOR YOU *slap*

Reminds me of this....

Then I am throwing down on spicy mustard. Come at me bro!

I personally love how we forced all those folks to eat ground up bugs shaped into cakes that look like big vaginas instead of bear claws on Mondays. *atheist high five*

You are saving the pickle jars for toenail clippings, obvs.

That is terrifying. Now instead of the hand under the bed, I'll be dreaming of the pug faced man under my bed.

I'm a giver.

They'll never find his head, the cats will have dragged it away so they can casually munch on it when they are feeling peckish.

Wow. I would love to hear tool done in major, just to see what it sounds like.

Can we talk about the music in the trailer? It took me a bit to place the song, because it sounded so creepy. Never knew that an Olivia Newton John song could make my skin crawl in a minor key. Bravo.

"Unless ordered by the court" isn't that breaking the law by following the law? If she doesn't consent to release her information, but the court decides it is in her best interest, isn't that a HIPAA violation? Or does she just essentially sign her rights away because she wants to terminate her pregnancy? (I imagine…

I wish he would put a shirt on...over his head. That mustache is positively obscene.

Never has a tragedy made me so hungry.

So a tater tot in my twat stops tots?

Ewwww, hygiene is a deal breaker. I like my dick like I like my bathtub, dirty and moldy.