That’s not how that works.

Bill Murray showed up to a random party when I was in college, and it never got reported anywhere. I think he just does shit like this all the time.

That place looks way too clean to be serving up the best Pad Thai you’ve ever had. You guys need to get out more. Was the bathroom even flooded?

My single cab ‘66 GMC longbed weighs 3,600 lbs. No way you’re getting anywhere close to 3,300 lbs with a BOF pickup that has anything close to modern safety equipment on it. A FIAT 500 weighs over 2,500 lbs nowadays.

You usually have to wait unril summer to hear that kind of gunfire.

That’s because they burn all the poison off before it gets to the pipes.

That’s because you’ve been drinking polluted Cleveland water. Totally normal.

+1 happy tree

Anyone who’s played baseball knows the bloody sock thing is bullshit even if it is real. You know how many times I clipped the inside of my ankle with my spikes? That shit used to happen to me all the time.

Is BJ Baldwin his porn name, or his real name?

That’s not a hot take. That’s a well thought out and accurate take. You even included a valid example.

In this case the “death penalty” should involve letting Janet Reno roll into town on a tank and razing the place.

Fuck Texas?

Fuck that entire town. Seems the police weren’t doing dick about it either.

You’re the guy that blows up his turbocharged engine because he doesn’t think engines need to warm up. It’s the oil that needs to warm up. Takes at least 5-10 minutes for oil to reach its proper temperature.

There’s lots of actual station wagons being produced today. They just don’t sell a lot of them in the US because they don’t sell. You can still buy a BMW wagon, a Mercedes wagon, and Volvo wagons in the US.

Why do parents have to go trick or treating with kids these days?

I don’t know, it doesn’t seem like those cops are having any issues killing unarmed people.

Well, here’s a list of pipeline accidents in the US since 2000, so the odds aren’t that low against the pipeline having an issue.

If you really think the core issue at Standing Rock has to do with the way we transport gas, then maybe it’s time you did some reading outside of a sarcastic car blog.