If Abraham Lincoln were still alive today, he’d have just celebrated his 209th birthday. So he’d be driving a Buick like everyone else his age.

A Mark IV of course.

Don’t forget to floss between the treads to get rid of any pebbles that may have become lodged in your tires.

My girlfriend likes a foot massage to relax. I’ve been building hand strength for 7 months in preparation to give my car a tire rub to get it comfortable before a wash.

Some car-washing tips the experts will never tell you:

Just because you found them doesn’t mean they are free. Fuck your dad and have to pay 4 mil.

I beg to differ. I present my first car, the 1988 Dodge Daytona.

Came here to post this. Leaving satisfied.

the right ‘wing’ has a fuel gauge, fuel range, outside temp, and your cruise control set speed.

It goes way deeper than that, my friend.

...and those lionine sections appear to have come from the coat of arms of Richard the Lionheart, which was used until about 1340:

That’s what happens when someone forgets to lock the dieselgate.

When America sends its cars, they do not send the best. They are not sending this. They are not sending that. They are sending cars that have lots of problems, and they are bringing those problems with us. They are bringing flood damage. They are bringing frame damage. They are salvage title. And some, I presume, are…

Just goes to show that GM is truly innovative - they’ve had vibrating trim panels years before everyone else.

I could NEVER drive deadlip’s hooptie.

X-37B suckered by FAKE NEWS from FAILING NYtimes, very unfair media. Sad!

You and I share this obligation.

If a clothing company released a “James May” collection I’d honestly feel obligated to buy a couple of shirts when I’m about to do some particularly pedantic or boring technical task.

My wife threatens to get me the purple rugby one he wore in Top Gear- I actually want it