An acquaintance here who is some kind of surgical nurse went on fully paid leave as soon as they found out she was pregnant because of some fumes or something that she is exposed to while working. I understand that the leave prior to giving birth didn’t count against her twelve months paid parental leave. Wonderful…

It could have also been Sweden, but we have the same kind of scheme in Germany. 12 months partially paid if one parent takes the leave, and 14 months combined partially paid if the second parent takes at least 2 months. It’s fucking awesome, and it does not specify which parent is the second parent or whatever. You…

Totally cultural. I’m in Germany, and the prevalent attitude here is “fuck off, don’t bother me. It’s my lunch break.” My supervisors not answer the phone. No one’s job is so important that someone else can’t do it, or that it can't wait 30 mins.

We're still in the midst, and waiting until we can give up our passports for a bit so we can take the last steps. It's complicated, man. It's also super cool that your hsband is down,me high I think is way more important than following through, as long as you're both not following through :p

I don’t think it’s actually quite that high in the US, but it is surprisingly high and for the same reason. So, the 96% belongs to Japan, but the patriarchal ideology belongs to both countries. This NY Times article breaks down some of the available data.

We are pretty hesitant, honestly, but it’s really important to her. To make it up to my husband, we’re going to do all those other things, too, but her husband can’t get off work that week, so we're stuck with those god awful days for Disney. Sigh.

UGH, my sister really wants to take us for our xmas present because it’s my husband’s first time on the west coast...and the only days that work are the Saturday and Sunday before Christmas D=

Aw, sorry:( if you can afford it, buy a new set of Christmas decorations for your tree, and let them be exactly yours. Try not to use anything that has memories from your ex. Make your own traditions or pull up something from your past, something that you did with your family when you were small or as a teenager/in…

Internet hugs...my kitty is really sick, too. We’re taking a big trip for Christmas and the vet wouldn’t clear her for air travel, so my in laws took her away by car yesterday. I felt like such an ungrateful asshole because I cried and cried, but it’s going to be at least five weeks before we can fetch her (it’s a…

Prescription prices are quite low (€5, in my experience), but there is a big cultural struggle in Bavaria between modernity and the church. Abortion cut-off is ten or twelve weeks, with minimum two appointments (I think it’s three, but can’t totally remember), with at least two different clinics involved. There might…

I must know the title and author of this bee book. Please and thank you!

Awesome! I am completely stoked to hear this. I used to work for a research company, and one of the projects we carried out was about women's health at the VA. I'm glad that the information has been useful, because from what the study participants said, the VA is often not a totally welcoming place re: women's issues.

I will be honest: I am on the verge of making a high stakes batch of Rice Krispie treats, and I’ve postponed it for several weeks because I’m anxious that I’ll ruin them. They’re high stakes because I had to import a box of the damned stuff via my mother, since it’s not available here, and when it’s gone, it's gone. I…

No pics, sadly, but I made an awesome black bean and shredded chicken soup in the crock pot. It’s kind of one of those recipes that is more assembled than cooked, but it turned out great and my husband luuurved it. Based on this recipe, with lots of tweaks. I can only get sharp white Irish cheddar here, so that’s what…

Anna says you can’t mess up Rice Krispie treats, but one of my first cooking memories is ruining a batch. I was quite small, and it was the first time I had made them alone. I thought they were fine because I didn’t burn the marshmallows, but also didn’t realize that I cooked them so hot that they would later turn…

Amazeballs. That shows way more dedication than I would have ever thought about.

Nice!

It can happen! Don’t give up hope. I had a passive dude also, who I ultimately left because he was not enthusiastic about our future together. Then I found someone who very enthusiasticly wanted to be with me! And now we’re married! And we’re gonna have sweet babies in a few years! And he’s like, super excited about…

Even when I was in the “marriage is just a piece of paper!”camp, I never understood being joint property owners or intentional parents without getting married. Like, it gives you so many rights, why wouldn’t you, you know? But I totally get you on the boyfriend title. I hated that in my last relationship. It sounds so…

You are not alone, friend. I had a nine year relationship, which included an engagement with no actual wedding planning or date, I asked him to elope (thinking that the problem was the big party aspect), but gave him months to decide...and he ultimately said no. Finally after that when I really felt the need to make…