I'm going to be opening a coffee shop soon, and all tips will go to the local Humane Society. I'll be paying an hourly wage that's significantly more than the minimum wage here and that's north of the figure you cited as well.

When my grandma turned 24 we stopped visiting her at the retirement home because she was too decrepit and grotesque.

Putting this gross old lady on my screen instantly killed my boner forever.

My husband is illegal and this is sickening. My husband and all of his illegal friends commit no crimes and work hard every day for a better life. Mexico and parts of South America are so dangerous right now and our immigration system is broken. His father applied for him to come over in 1993 and 1999 and even sent in…

I have a solution! :)

Heeeeey new Americans! Welcome. I heard you're getting some strange stuff in the mail. Feel free to turn it into profit here: http://sellpantiesformoney.com/ There's nothing my compatriots love more than a bootstrappin' story.

I'm sorry but I don't speak Hogwarts.

This is America, damnit.

Reductio ad Hitlerum is a helluva drug.

And now, instead of putting them in the garbage, I will send ALIPAC all of my panty liners!

People like that, I don't engage in debate with...I simply tell them this....

Everytime I read something like this it reminds me of a video I saw somewhere on the internet of a Native American man strolling a child in a stroller in front of a anti- immigration rally. While they're ranting and raving about keeping illegals out, this man is steady telling them all their truths about murdering and…

"hey guys you know what we should do to escape the gay and sexual overtones associated with the 'teabaggers' label?"

Tell ya what, guys. You present verifable paperwork that documents your blood heritage leading back to a Native American tribe and that also shows that you have 100 % blood line from that tribe. Then when that is done, maybe we'll listen to your concerns about all these scary immigrants coming to take your jobs and…

Pointless Opinion Alert:

If only the Jews would have sent the Nazis our dirty underwear, we could have avoided that whole genocide situation! Stay classy ALIPAC!

These assholes should:

Good work, pediatrician. For such a young baby, another day of dehydration can be very serious. I'm glad someone was looking out for that baby.

A muffin is just a sad, naked cupcake with nothing to live for.