No. I am in Charleston, SC.
That is exactly how he talks and writes.

Who takes $55k cash only for a car? Do they expect someone to show up with a briefcase full of $100s?

I cut myself today
To see if I am still strong
I let the car slide away
The only way I could
The curb it tears a hole
The old familiar sting
Try to resist the tear
But I am too dry rotted

That is a terrible imitation of a Root article. You forgot to call her a “Becky”, Maybe even “the Beckiest Becky that ever Beckied”(true quote from one of their columnists) and to make a snide comment about “wypipo”. You need to up your game!

I’m dying to read how “The Root” will depict this, but I’m not going there. I must be strong. That’s why I made the Jalopnik left sidebar disappear: I was deadly annoyed of seeing the suggestions to read their articles.

It’s Australia. How will it try to kill me?

McCain 3:16 says you can’t whip enough votes!

She should have just answered with a “Si”.

My windshield wipers are dull so I moved to Syria.

So he complained about how getting functioning tires would make his Model S look like a Ford Focus, so he got the Tesla that (apart from the gull wings) looks like an actual Ford Focus (hatchback)?

It looks like a cop car from a videogame that can’t afford licenses for real chevys.

What the hell are you waiting for? I got off at work hours ago.

Now show us how he parked at the airport...

Sure, you’re going to decrease street racing, but this is almost certainly going to increase street pro-wrestling matches.

Now she will sue the operator for water damage.

Bass? Dropped.

PSA: I will pay someone to get on the fucking payload.

While easy to install the seats...you all have done a great job show casing how not to do harnesses on a car. 5/6 point harnesses in street car are dangerous w/o a roll bar and proper harness guide bar. A roll bar is dangerous without a helmet. Before you do “cool” mods please do the research to the safety…

She isn’t?

OK, what the Hell kind of running is that? This would be much more entertaining if she were wearing a Grimace costume.