Our Harry Potter is a little lady called Sabrina Spellman. And the Other Realm folks DO NOT PLAY AROUND. THEY WILL PUT YOU IN A JAR OR MAKE YOU WORK IN A LIBRARY.

Does anybody remember when Sabrina (of teenage witch fame) had to elude a descendant of a witch hunter who sensed she was trouble? Am I wrong to think that JK took a page from that show? Am I HOPING she did cause I was a fan of that show? I hated that story arc, but still....

I don't personally have children but I've seen enough Lifetime movies to know that those "Au Pairs" are nothing but baby thieving monsters. Enjoy your kidnapping nightmare, ladies.

I always picture some awful misogynist behind the new model of feminism.

Its the professional equivalent of trying not to fall asleep before your sibling because they want to watch TV and you want to be an asshole.

Worst cashier moment: getting antibiotics for Chlamydia and the pharma tech being all "do they work? 90 dollars, wow." I just about shrank.

Did it taste good? From a person who hates food cooked in those plastic Reynolds wrap bags.

The owl being “forever is a long time and has a way of changing things
always gets me. Like, come on. He was a baby.

And buffoon is an 18th century term for a black pirate.

Because she loves each and every one of you so much and isn't stepping on peoples backs to support herself.

Whatever he says in regards to race isn't going to sound right At least he isn't using people of color as props like Clinton is. What she's doing is reminding me of Steven Colbert's old "my black friend" sketch.

Get out of here, uterus. You aint welcome!

Off topic: Fox and the Hound is a surprisingly dark and depressing movie to watch as an adult. Even my toddler niece was watching it with me, and was all, "this movie is too sad".

I was guilty of it too until I realized she actually had mental problems and wasn't just some Tila-esque moron trying to become a youtube star. I feel bad now.

I wonder how many people called in late to work today due to “Naked Truck Dancer”. Little tidbit also: 290 is seriously one of the worst freeways I have ever driven on, and one little fender bender is enough to shut the whole operation down. Since where the incident occurred is close to a hospital, I'm wondering if…

Just a heads up on what not to do when you miss a period after:

I read one book that explained how her obliviousness towards the struggles and mindset of people of color was a huge part of the prosecution losing the case.

(me skimming through the Jezzer headlines)

Lol, conservative baby boomers are always posting shit like this on facebook. Like "be happy with what you have, ingrates". Yeah, I bet you wouldn't be saying that if someone cut off your opiate supply, grand dad.

And even if you do all that, the older people in whatever firm you managed to sidle your way into will make it SUPER difficult for you to move up or even exist. Example: my first “real” job out of college was fraught with a lot of people 15-20 years older than me without degrees who were not happy I was in the…