Nobody should be told about Olive Garden.

That's definitely true. The truly great players like Michael Jordan and Magic Johnson never got coaches fired. They never did, so don't even do any research on either of their careers and try to find evidence that they had coaches like Doug Collins and Paul Westhead fired, because they never did that, because they…

Blatt is the coach. Lebron's just trying to give the King James translation.

"Hi, is this Jason? Yeah, uhh... is your refrigerator running? It is? Well, you better go catch it! I'm just kidding, I know you'll catch it, your UZR/150 was 20.5 last season, anyway hi this is Adam Wainwright."

Meh, you can make it work for you:

Now let's move onto this week's Foodspin: How to Deep-Fry a Turkey Without Fucking Burning Yourself Alive in a Horrific But Gorgeous Grease Fire.

"WHITE PEOPLE ARE THE DEVIL BLACK PEOPLE ARE THE BEST" -a person so fucking white they write for Gawker

"You don't even look good when you sing."

That's got to be a suspension, no? Just pushing a dude into an effing camera well after the whistle seems a bit extreme.

What a goofy fun-loving guy!

In almost every other country, a youth player has to sign a contract of some sort that ties him to that club. Therefore, the club has a stake in his development and will receive a payment when he leaves - either a training fee or a transfer fee. A US player doesn't sign an amateur contract (for a variety of reasons),…

True, but that means that the revenue that is generated is going directly to operations. Covering their fixed costs is more important when they aren't sitting on a fat TV contract.

Just remove college. If a person is so good that he can make a career of being an athlete, don't force him to study and waste time and money. The league should be signing these youngsters. If they are pros when they're 16, imagine how great they'll be when they are 22-23, the age a college athlete enters the MLS…

Compare the TV contracts of US leagues... that's where the big boys make their money. It's not the same for MLS, that's for sure.

Nice Haisley. Steal my post from the Klinsman thread, keep it in pending and make it your own. Sweet job at Deadspin.

Which means build MLS.

My biggest problem with what Klinsmann is doing is that he's damaging the reputation of the MLS academy system which is starting to bear fruit after a lot of years of work. Can MLS teams offer professional contracts to all promising 16 year old right now? No, but more and more players are signing Homegrown Player…

It's more important that we grow a successful, high-quality domestic soccer league in the US than to just keep throwing our best players at Europe in the slim hope that they maybe get good enough to win the world cup in 12 years. I appreciate Jurgen's passion but his goals are narrow and short-sided. The World Cup is…

They're not on par with most foreign leagues, but I disagree that it's not "remotely debatable". In fact, I think most Americans jump ship to Europe far too soon and that MLS is a great opportunity for them to find their legs and really understand the game before they're thrown into the deep end across the ocean. …

You can't have it both ways. MLS is a business and ownership groups don't put money into the clubs so they can be retirement homes or a farm system for leagues overseas. The league needs guys like Michael Bradley and Clint Dempsey to help attract fans. I'd say the league would have fallen flat and bankrupt had…