what does any of that actually mean?

Sushi restaurants must be hysterical

This is some of the cheapest stupidest journalism.

Ah man, I used to race pallet jacks around receiving at an Office Depot. I dicked off so much there.

I’ve quit a shit-ton of jobs after one day, or a couple days, or less than a month, all ranging from call center to restaurant to pool gigs. I’ve quit several jobs by burning the bridge. I am no stranger to cutting ties.

lakes have beaches

lol, you really got them! /s

halcyon digest is where i first saw that word. this is the second time. i think i know what it means now.

dang oh we dem dang ol mud dogs, we beat dem in da bourbon bo, skeohdoh!

at the TD club no less...these bozos have a morning show in Arkansas that lands somewhere on the spectrum between retarded opie and anthony and retarded bill simmons.

If they’re wicked smart they won’t need college, just a couple late fees at the library. 

Someone needs to gif his forehead so it is constantly roiling 

BUY HIGH SELL HIGHER

“my life is one giant contradiction” starter pack.

So, Louis CK, who didn’t actually assault anyone, can’t do comedy anymore because your feelz > a paying audience?

wut

Coach Highcock

His eyelid was jammed.

This young man is literally a portmanteau of locomotive accident.

LOL