Three members of the same family are dying from black lung and the remaining members are still shaking their fists and growling about Obama killing the coal industry and their towns.

Battle Of The Waving Noodle Person Thingys Outside Of A Car Dealership

I'm so literal about themes, I'd show up wrapped in HDMI cables and microchips.

NYE 1999 belonged to him.

When the back-up lights went on I spit milk out my nose.

My favorite part was when he threw it in reverse around 25 seconds in

That driver really should have had the insight to know the water was too deep.

All. Of. It.

If I had the money - I’d give her a good paying job - to just follow him around and yell at him like that for the rest of his term (or life...).

Actually I can name a few scenes where peens were clearly visible.

We really are just the stupidest country...

I generally steer clear of Kardashian posts. Regardless, I felt like chiming in on this. Here’s someone who did something really well and the conversation still turned to her looks. I thought it was a shame.

CAN WE TALK ABOUT HER SHOES

she can do whatever the fuck she wants!

I just loved that her nails were blue, her suit and eyeshadow were red, and then her hair.... HER FUCKING HAIR! was the white part of the flag. This lady. That’s some ridunculous shit there.

Right after the National Anthem, I turned to my wife and said, “That’s terrible of the camera man to make the flyover look blurry.” She said, “Here’s a tissue, dear.” It was beautiful.

Bey didn’t almost fall - gravity momentarily forgot who it was fuckng with.

okay Beyonce was amazing... but can we talk about Lady Gaga for a second? our national anthem is known among singers for being a bitch and a half, and girl NAILED it without breaking a sweat. I was seriously impressed.

White people who compare mild to moderate situations/annoyances to MLK’s struggle are the fucking worst.

That bear is best bear, grandly carrying on the tradition of fucking with dipshit humans who fuck with bears.