Photographer: Let's get one of you in front of the mirror, Coach Washington.
Washington: Nice, shall I pull it off the wall or can you?

As opposed to Craig Bjornson, who only wishes he was in a bathroom when his photo was taken.

Now let me see your war face!

Move along ladies...this one is taken.

"Surgery On His Dickhole"? Seriously, guys, urethra new low with that one.

That 30-year veteran Texas referee has clearly not seen me play basketball.

RT @elkpga Why hasnt Obama taken care of that Ben Gauzey guy......

#BenGauzey
#fukme

Nice try, Samer, but you're totally wrong. Elkington can't be my uncle. Unlike Steve, my uncle has already died from cirrhosis of the liver.

Sam: "I dunno, Coach. Even washed-up golfers are giving me shit. This is a really difficult time for me..."

.

...but you have to help yourself.

Just imagine the distraction reaction if it was a wall of penises.

Matheny called it "a distraction" the righty did not need.

Which is why Martinez will only be using his left hand from this point forward.

This shouldn't be surprising. Getting 17 without any assists is his typical stat line.

+1 (with 3 minutes to go)

Ugh, who puts a nose on their smiley faces?

Rosemary's Bear.

Proto-Nightmare Bear does not appear to have arms or legs in this photo. We prefer not to think about how he eventually procured some.