I’ve never liked Jennifer Aniston. There. I said it. She was the worst Friend (yes, worse than Ross) and her presence in Office Space took something away from what was otherwise a perfect movie. I don’t think she can act. There. Said that, too.

“But, but, but...it’s not the gun’s fault. If a person wants to kill themselves they’ll find a way to do it.”

Also, fuck you people who espouse that logic.

Fuck you people who keep your guns ”hidden.”

Goddammit, lock that shit up in a gun safe and the bullets some place else.

God-damn. Shots FIRED. Kudos, Billy!

Chris Knight will never age, and I will ignore all evidence of a Real Genius remake.

And she is older than he is! I am shipping them so hard right now. Clearly Harry is the best royal.

Aren’t we all?

Sadly, he would be on Stephen’s side. Adam Baldwin is as right-wing loony as they come.

I think he’s the only fair haired man I ever found attractive

lol Baldwins, there are so many of you!

Someone with Twitter please, please appeal to Alec, Daniel, and Billy to gang up on Stephen and give him ALL of the purple nurples and pink bellies.

Funny, the question I ask myself every night is “Why am I not sleeping with Idris Elba? WHY, DEAR GOD, WHY???”

Wow, that is so hilarious. Go Billy!

Counterpoint: “sexy puritan” is a good and hilarious costume. (But honestly, I think you have to be living under a rock to have somehow missed the memo that dressing up as a fucking caricature of a Native American isn’t okay.)

Apparently it’s not Halloween until we have our first racist celebrity costume.

Not anymore. Fingers crossed Starburst will someday be gelatin-free too, how I miss them!

Typically you get non- food treats (blinky flashing rings, glow sticks etc) and keep them in a separate bowl from the candy. I’ve found that a lot of kids prefer the non-candy stuff even if they don’t have allergies.

I’ve actually seen several different suggestions—mostly on my Facebook newsfeed since though I am child-free, most of my friends are moms—for things that can be handed out. Some are candy that are free of tree nuts, so you’d still have to confirm that the kid isn’t allergic to something else. Others are things like…

Obama interacting with babies...like I really love him for a lot of reasons but seeing a guy with all that power who has such genuine interactions with children is just....dammit I’m gonna miss him!

That movie doesn’t get the attention it deserves! So fucking hilarious - from Michael Cera being a hardcore drug/sex addict to Danny McBride threatening to jack off all over everything... brb gotta go watch it real quick.