They told us all our lives growing up, “Work hard, stay in school, study, go to college and get a degree, because you don’t want to flip burgers for a living.”

Well, we worked hard, stayed in school, studied, got a college degree, accruing tens of thousands of dollars in debt, and we emerged from college to find a…

Ummmm, no actually. I’m pretty sure I’ve *never* heard a saying involving alligater mouths overloading hummingbird asses.

Really, German? Doug I am so disappointed in you right now.

It looks like it fell out of the sky.

I noted while living in the states the yanks often use the brand name of products, more often than the generic/chemical name of products than we do in the UK.. and then I’d ask what brand of Hoover they had.

Just the rims, or the hub and spokes too?

The children who refuse grill lines eventually become the adults who want their milkshake in a bag.

It’s funny that Liverpool took a huge chance and paid so much money for a striker who likely would never live up to what they paid.

Reporters confirmed that Eden Hazard gestured to the referee to bring on the medical team and the referee gave the signal to come on to the pitch.

This has been your weekly reminder that José Mourinho is a huge douchecanoe.

shockingly, mourinho continues to act like a petulant child

Sign contract = $200 phone

finishing 5th in the top half of the prem is literally ‘top-tier’ you git. they are literally top tier mainstays.

All you need to know about what Deadspin ... er Greg wants to happen, check the word counts:

Spurs are a very good team that can play attractive football, and have a long history. Unfortunately they have also had very bad luck, and are currently overshadowed by bigger ie “richer” London clubs like Chelsea and Arsenal.

First off, shut up, Greg.

OO Spurs bashing, it’s as if the writers on Screamer worship Arsenal. That Jack Wilshere injury was right on schedule

So instead of treating him like a potential customer (even if he seemed brash), you treated like an asshole. Can't wait for direct sales. You say yourself it was possibly his first time buying a new car. You could have had a customer for life. As someone who runs a small business, I've never seen more ass backwards…

Comedy. That’s exactly how I’ve purchased my last ... five? vehicles as well as two for friends. It doesn’t work on all stealerships but if you time it right, there’s going to be some desperate leech who will bite at invoice pricing or invoice + a pittance.

As annoying as guys like that are, I can’t wait until dealers disappear. The ultimate middle-men, and probably the most useless.