I am so cyclopsed beyond aurora nightcrawler! Holy beast, firestar!

No shame here: Urban Chipmunk. Or maybe Sesame Street Fever. Can't remember which one was first. The memory is hazy - too many Pop Rocks and Popeye Cigarettes.

If there is indeed bullshit involved in your masturbatory practices, you may be doing it wrong. I'm sure a simple Google search or a well-intended YouTube video will help push (or in this case, pull) you in the right erection.

Duck Boyd is so good at playing obtuse dirtbags. As much as I am indifferent to his presence in the season, I love every scene in which he appears.

Is that a vagina on the board in the background? IS GEORGIA O'KEEFFE THE MYSTERIOUS HEAD OF ISI?!

FYC was my original thought, although with Fat Elvis's penchant for chowing down, who's to say? Thematically, they both fit.

People need to be more understanding. They're caught in a trap, they can't walk out. Why can't you see what you're doing to them? When you don't believe a word they say?

There was someone on the Oakland A's earlier this season who was using (or had chosen for him as a joke) "Careless Whisper." Soooo good.

Milkshake. There is no better song in the history of the universe. Milkshake.

A celebration of cinematic excrement.

When I was in high school, I got mono, which meant I couldn't see my friends or girlfriend for more than three weeks. It was brutal.

Kelis brought all the boys to the yard. How? She would teach you, but she would have to charge.

"Who-ha" is in reference to a hoo-hah of undetermined origin. For example, "Yeah, I saw Tawny and Belinda down at the beach. The sun was in my eyes, but I was still able to make out one who-ha."

Jimmie Walker needs to be cast as Brother Dy-no-MITE, Papa Midnight's wise-crackin' no-nonsense sidekick. It just might be the single most amazing television event in recorded history.

Not a fan of his shows, but that's a classy move. Nice one MacFarlane.

I wish I had the superpower to make this go away. Perhaps I'll find it at the bottom of a bottle of bourbon. A really big bottle.

One Direction and Justin Bieber as the Cylons. Strike fear into the heart of humanity.

Jennifer Schillig, I pray that you are right. I'm just sick of all of these modernized versions of children's classics that bastardize the spirit of the original text.

That bass line from Barney Miller. I'll be singing it to everyone I know now for the next 23 days.

That first episode where Cillian Murphy wakes up in the hospital not knowing where he was and then starts walking through the empty streets of London was fantastic.