Man, reading some of these answers reminds me how good we had it. Our high school cafeteria was fucking great. 3 hot meals every day on a two or three week rotation with a choice of a hot or cold meal, salad bar and soup, as well a pasta bar every Wednesday (the athletics department scheduled most games on Wednesdays…

If there’s one thing I’ve learned over the years of reheating way too much unhealthy food, it’s that a combination of the microwave and toaster oven is almost universally the best option if it’s something you want fast and with any sort of crunch or crispiness.

For anyone looking to take advantage of this, it’s only valid for the newly vaccinated, as he clarified in a follow up tweet. I was getting my shots no matter what, but it would have been nice to get a $50... provided I actually went to DC.

As for having to squeeze between tables, well... an etiquette expert told me once that you want your ass to be facing your own table.

I think I’ve been to those two places only once or twice each. It’s not good, but they serve a purpose. A friend of mine loves Applebees because he travels a lot for work, and it gives him some level of consistency (even if it is consistently mediocre at best). They’re relatively cheap, so if you get a per diem, you…

Yeah, if I see something I *know* I don’t like, I’ll avoid it, especially if I’ve never been there before. Even if it’s just a topping on a specialty burger, I still feel like it was probably designed to have a certain flavor profile and with plenty of other things I do like, it’s not fair to them for me to alter it…

I only worked in the industry for a few years, only a couple of them being full time, the rest on-and-off, all at a small family-owned pizzeria. Maybe we were lucky with our clientele and didn’t get a lot of dipshittery, maybe I just got out early enough before personal experience jaded me on restaurant customers…

Good news: They’re not getting rid of anything good.

I would hope not. As to why it’s on a special menu, maybe it’s because they have to use the vegan version of some items, and don’t want anyone to accidentally use the non-vegan version if it were on the regular menu? I mean, that would be fairly sloppy of the kitchen, but mistakes do happen. Or maybe the servers let…

Absolutely. I thought that was implied, but obviously I wasn’t clear, so thanks for adding this!

In the end, however, as a diner—don’t feel obligated to change your order around these things.

Trademark issue aside, I almost wouldn’t even mind if they were at least mindful enough to not list restaurants that don’t do takeout. I mean, I know all they do is just scrub the web to find menus and list them (as wonderfully illustrated in Doordash and Pizza Arbitrage) without paying any attention, but that seems…

Hot chocolate. I don’t go to Starbucks. Not for any principled stance (I don’t have any), or distaste for the coffee (I’ve never tried it), or any reason other than there’s no convenient drive thru Starbucks, at least not one that doesn’t always have a line 30-deep when I’m driving past on my way to work.

Read the title wrong and got very confused when he started gorging himself, wondering when he was going to start wasting away from not eating.

Cool.

I’m not concerned about getting grease on a spatula—although if I’m really feeling lazy I probably make over easy eggs and skip the spat altogether, using just the fork I’ll be eating with to manage the bacon and flip the bread—it just seems pointless to me to be balancing anything when it can be set down.

That’s fair, but that’s also where the awaiting plate can come in. No need for a balancing act with a spatula.

Hold the bread on a spatula while you pour

I don’t follow Epicurious’ work, but I think this is a key takeaway from their article, especially knowing how mad certain folk will be getting:

Maybe. I know in the 18 years I’ve lived here I’ve never seen them, but it could have been before I moved here or I just never noticed.