Joe Francis: Holy Shit, what a jerk. If anyone else watches VHI couple's therapy, you know his jerkitude is so colossal that it's hard to process. Not that I thought he'd be a great guy, but holy shit. I would not put any of this past him, based on his behavior on that show, which included joking about his girlfriend…

Wait, what? Ok, I need to know whether that's an intentional vagina necklace or an unintentional vagina necklace. Because it's definitely a vagina necklace.

Interesting that you say that considering that almost everyone is assuming the southern states with ebony are due to racists despite the fact that those states top the census in African American populations.

So, do they not watch porn in Utah? Mormonism is working?

Piers Morgan + Twerking =

Next week on Lifehacker: How to get melted wax out of your car's carpets during an unexpected heatwave.

This is the only Riff Raff that we need to talk about. (aka I am old)

As always, my favorite thing about these shows is the inevitable onslaught of Tumblr posts with amazing photoshop jobs/comparisons/tweets/gifs. I am going to share them with you now, starting with the best (the rest are in the replies because I don't want to make y'all scroll forever down the comments):

I love mushrooms, edible or no. If the orange one you posted has gills on the underside, it's probably not a bolete. Boletes have a spongy, pore-like underside. And they are cool. And I am a geek. It all started with the morels we used to gather in the woods behind my house and now I am a mushroom photographing dork.…

Yes, please to that!

I really hope they bring back Miss Claudette

I really wish publishers would stop messing with book covers. Just wait till the "movie version" comes out. UGH. I refuse to purchase books with the movies as the cover. Its the literary hipster in me: I liked this book before it was cool!

All I can say is that the bag in question looks a lot like the Marc by Marc Jacobs "Natasha"

Hey—I am a child of the 80's and we all read Flowers in the Attic too! This is one old-school book.

I WOULD WEAR CATS IN SPACE EVERY DAY. EVEN UNDER MY WORK BLOUSES.

I love everything about your comment...hate of Kris K (any Kardashian, really) and being so over tabloid criticisms of why/how/when women "gain" weight (wear fluffy shorts, i.e.)

I think the self-aggrandizing parts are pretty telling, regardless of what this person might have been doing.

I can't decide what I hate more. Her or her shoes. Answer me this...how do her shoes feel about the recent paper in the Journal of Law, Medicine and Ethics that advocates holding people legally accountable for the harm they cause by not vaccinating their children?

I'm gonna need a Fleshlight, some Karo Corn Syrup, Red Dirt from Hawaii, and an Alternator from a 1957 Land Rover Defender to make my batch of Meth.