"Getting a date" is not the same as "dating", though.

I asked a guy out once and he told me I was too aggressive for him. I think threatened is a perfectly reasonable word.

Have fun getting raped when you reject strange men that pursue you! Because it might be easier to get pursued than the other way around, but I hope you've got thick skin because everything from verbal to physical to sexual assault will be your "privilege" as a woman being chased by straight men. Notice I didn't say…

Thanks to the beauty of an IUD no. Which is good since I live near Lake Michigan.

we were meant to beeeeeee.

I feel like first period stories are like first time having sex stories. They're a badge of honor and we can all sit around trading them like grizzled old soldiers.

I forgot one of the best parts: because I wasn't getting in the pool I ended up mumbling to my fellow campers (several of them older than me) what had happened. They spent the rest of the day telling me period horro stories and that one time a distant aunthad a miscarriage and the baby came out when she peed, leaving…

Eleven years old. In a bus, on the way to a camp field trip. Reading an Abraham Lincoln biography (because that's how I roll). I feel nauseous and weird. When we arrive at our destination, I go to the bathroom only to discover blood everywhere. I'm still not sure who was more horrified, me or the counsellor who I…

Toodles!

Some schools lead people to believe it's the only option. And given how shitty most police forces are at dealing with sexual assault and rape survivors, it's no surprise that some people would rather turn to a known university employee than an unknown officer.

WHY ISN'T THIS IN MY MOUTH RIGHT NOW?

I do want to know if the PR person who came up with "biased, boring, bougie" for her got a raise, because they DESERVE IT.

For the first time, you've made me sad. I will fight you, on behalf of Lady Licorice and Beloved Raisinets. Not to fucking mention Charleston Chews.

I've had those. Well, mac & cheese bites that are fried. They're pretty good.

I've lived in and around Chicago my whole life and I have no problem with that assertion. I think it's more than likely that racism played a huge factor in this.

As a Chicagoan? Living in a city where a police officer shut his own bar down because there were too many black people in it?

I saw bacon and jumped right to the end and honestly don't care what's in the rest of this piece. Slather me in orange chicken with bacon and leave me alone.

A friend of mine and I were discussing the zero-sum nature of some women's behavior in male-dominated spaces (only one girl at a time, any additional women in the space represent competition) and her shouted response was "THE PIE IS INFINITE, PEOPLE." Between that and the gold thing, I'm set for life.

I really like that metaphor, mind if I steal it?

Yeah, my dog is grain free and poultry free (yay allergies!) and it gets expensive. I started comparing the ingredients in my food to the ingredients in his and got a little sad.