That’s why they’re so cute for so long. Adults are tricked into protecting them from themselves by teh cute.

Every time I see a picture of this actress, I think she’s in some Nickelodeon show. Seriously, she looks like she’s 15.

Is it? Big boobs, yes. Small waist, yes. But wide hips? Cuz I have a small waist/big hips thing going on and I’ve never gotten anything but shit for it, and my look is nowhere as dramatic as these ladies’. In a way there’s something subversive about a look that aims to make the hips-a body part that is usually…

Of course. To not use it is like listening to 60s hippy music and not know the peace sign.

Like he knows what satire is.

Oooh, I like that. The description for Trump, not the poor kitten’s predicament. Another potential descriptor: wind-burned bag of scrotal skin.

This says it all: http://www.buzzfeed.com/adamdavis/the-…

Amateur. I’ve refused to accept any sovereign after Harold Godwinson.

Wait, Carson says he fought off a bear? Was he talking about the animal or someone at a gay bar?

Also, by remembering that they’re humans we can help to prevent others from following their paths. People who join terrorist groups often start out feeling hopeless and searching for a purpose and some amount of control over their lives. They’re a lot like people who join cults, but the main difference is that most…

Ben Carson was way too animated in the opening bit. I think it would’ve been funnier if he were even more somnolent while apologizing for being upset. But otherwise it was pretty funny.

Whereas cats just say fuck you and leave.

Oh, so NOW this bitch believes in the germ theory.

Ceci n’est pas une herpe

The chicken was the only one who gave a fuck. I guess not wanting to become dinner is a good motivator.

My state PA is doing the right thing and is still welcoming refugees and the mayor of my hometown Pittsburgh said he’ll take up to 500 refugees. I’m so proud.

The IRA were Muslim?

Ah yes, the annual golden retriever migration on their way to spawning. Goldies as far as the eye could see...

NEVER apologize for nerdery.

Yes, you should be ashamed.